Strategies For Addressing Separation Anxiety In Daycare?

Separation anxiety is a common issue in children’s development, and it can be challenging for both the child and the parent. To manage this anxiety, it is essential to remain calm and positive when saying goodbye, smile, and assure the child that you will see them soon. This routine will help your child get used to drop-offs and reassure them that they are safe.

Practicing leaving is another way to help your child get used to separations. Start small by telling your child you are leaving, and gradually increase the distance. Be consistent with your explanations and diligence to return when you say goodbye. By managing separation anxiety effectively, parents can build their child’s confidence in moving from their comfort zone towards new challenges.

Separation anxiety disorders are rare, and most children will stop crying when you are out of sight and engaged at daycare. With nurturing and time, your child will become secure in your care.

To help older children with separation anxiety, talk about what you will do together later, practice short separations and work toward longer ones. Leave a soft toy or blanket with your child to help ease separations, comfort your child when they are afraid, introduce any new caregiver gradually, and make goodbyes quick and positive.

To deal with separation anxiety in childcare, explain what will happen, create a goodbye routine, speak with the center team, encourage open communication, create quick good-bye rituals, and maintain attention. Create a routine, start with short separations, and set an enjoyable environment for your child. Be calm and consistent, creating an exit ritual with a pleasant, loving, and firm goodbye. Reassure your child and stay calm during the transition.


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How to support a child with separation anxiety?

Separation anxiety is a common issue in children aged 6 months to 3 years, where they feel anxious when their primary caregiver leaves their sight. This anxiety can be easily detected by noticing tears at daycare drop off, a lack of interest in their child, or a reluctance to leave their parent or caregiver. To help support your child, discuss future plans, practice short and longer separations, leave a soft toy or blanket, comfort your child when they are afraid, introduce new caregivers gradually, and make quick and positive goodbyes.

By addressing separation anxiety, you can help your child feel more safe and secure, ultimately helping them manage difficult feelings and develop a better understanding of the temporary nature of separations.

How to deal with separation anxiety in children?
(Image Source: Pixabay.com)

How to deal with separation anxiety in children?

Separation anxiety is a common issue in children aged 6 months to 3 years, where they feel anxious when their primary caregiver leaves their sight. This anxiety can be easily detected by noticing tears at daycare drop off, a lack of interest in their child, or a reluctance to leave their parent or caregiver. To help support your child, discuss future plans, practice short and longer separations, leave a soft toy or blanket, comfort your child when they are afraid, introduce new caregivers gradually, and make quick and positive goodbyes.

By addressing separation anxiety, you can help your child feel more safe and secure, ultimately helping them manage difficult feelings and develop a better understanding of the temporary nature of separations.

What are 5 symptoms of separation anxiety?
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What are 5 symptoms of separation anxiety?

Separation anxiety disorder (SAD) is a mental health issue where a child is anxious about being apart from family members or close people. The symptoms include refusing to sleep alone, repeated nightmares with a theme of separation, worry about family safety, fear of getting lost, refusing to go to school, and being fearful and reluctant to be alone. SAD is normal in very young children, with nearly all children aged 18 months to 3 years old having separation anxiety and being clingy to some degree.

However, symptoms of SAD are more severe, and a child must have symptoms for at least 4 weeks for the problem to be diagnosed as SAD. Experts believe that SAD is caused by both biological and environmental factors, with an imbalance of two chemicals in the brain (norepinephrine and serotonin) likely playing a part.

What age is separation anxiety the worst?

Separation anxiety is a normal development in babies, where they learn that separations from parents are not permanent and that hidden objects are still present. This anxiety typically peak between 10 and 18 months and ends by 3 years old. Signs of separation anxiety include fear of a parent leaving and not returning, which may worsen when a stranger is present. Babies with separation anxiety may experience waking up and crying at night after sleeping through the night. It is crucial for babies to understand the concept of time and object permanence.

What is the best therapy for separation anxiety in children?
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What is the best therapy for separation anxiety in children?

Separation anxiety disorder (SAD) is a common mental, emotional, and behavioral issue affecting children aged 9-17. Treatment typically involves therapy, medication, or a combination of both. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is the most common form of therapy, focusing on helping children and parents change unhelpful thoughts and behaviors. Therapists can also help parents understand how their behavior may increase their child’s anxiety.

It is crucial to seek medical advice if you suspect your child has SAD, as untreated anxiety can grow. Girls are more affected than boys. About 13 out of every 100 children aged 9-17 experience some form of anxiety disorder, including SAD.

What is the most effective treatment for separation anxiety?
(Image Source: Pixabay.com)

What is the most effective treatment for separation anxiety?

Separation anxiety disorder (SAD) is a common mental, emotional, and behavioral issue affecting children aged 9-17. Treatment typically involves therapy, medication, or a combination of both. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is the most common form of therapy, focusing on helping children and parents change unhelpful thoughts and behaviors. Therapists can also help parents understand how their behavior may increase their child’s anxiety.

It is crucial to seek medical advice if you suspect your child has SAD, as untreated anxiety can grow. Girls are more affected than boys. About 13 out of every 100 children aged 9-17 experience some form of anxiety disorder, including SAD.

What therapy is best for separation anxiety?
(Image Source: Pixabay.com)

What therapy is best for separation anxiety?

Separation anxiety disorder (SAD) is a common mental, emotional, and behavioral issue affecting children aged 9-17. Treatment typically involves therapy, medication, or a combination of both. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is the most common form of therapy, focusing on helping children and parents change unhelpful thoughts and behaviors. Therapists can also help parents understand how their behavior may increase their child’s anxiety.

It is crucial to seek medical advice if you suspect your child has SAD, as untreated anxiety can grow. Girls are more affected than boys. About 13 out of every 100 children aged 9-17 experience some form of anxiety disorder, including SAD.

How to solve separation anxiety?

Separation anxiety in babies and toddlers is a common issue between the ages of 6 months and 3 years. It is a normal part of their development and usually grows out of it. To address this, it is recommended to practice short separations from your baby, such as leaving them in someone else’s care for a few minutes while you shop. Discuss future plans together, leave something comforting with your baby, and make saying goodbye a positive time. Separation anxiety may occur when your baby used to be calm and happy when you left the room, but it may not seem to make sense when you’re not there or strangers are close.

How do nurseries deal with separation anxiety?
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How do nurseries deal with separation anxiety?

The nursery’s keyworker approach helps address separation anxiety by allowing one nurse to take specific responsibility for a child and build a close bond with them. This approach may use items like books and toys to build trust with the child. Separation anxiety is a feeling of stress experienced by a child when they are away from their parent or main carer, often causing them to cry. It indicates a child’s realization of their dependency on them and makes them feel unsafe without them.

Separation anxiety is a normal part of a child’s development between six months and five years. Common behaviors indicating separation anxiety include clinging to parents, extreme crying, refusing to do actions that would lead to separation, physical illness, violent tantrums, refusal to sleep alone, and nightmares.

How can educators help with separation anxiety?
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How can educators help with separation anxiety?

Children may experience upset when separating from caregivers in the morning. Provide warm and calm support and acknowledge their feelings. If a child is too upset to join class, provide a safe space. Some children may separate easier if they can choose where their parent will say goodbye. If separation is causing distress, allow parents to help in the program initially. Gradually reduce parent involvement as the child feels more secure.

Children with anxiety may find transitioning from early childhood education and care setting to another setting challenging. For more information on supporting children with disabilities when transitioning to a different education setting, visit AllPlay Learn’s transition page.

How long does daycare separation anxiety last?
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How long does daycare separation anxiety last?

Separation anxiety in toddlers typically fades within a few weeks, depending on their temperament and the response of the caregiver and daycare. It’s rare for separation anxiety to persist daily after preschool years. If you suspect your toddler isn’t adapting to daycare, consult with your childcare provider and pediatrician for separation anxiety strategies. Toddlers may not express their anxiety in a straightforward manner, so it’s crucial to decipher signs such as changes in sleep or difficulty nodding off. It’s essential to address separation anxiety in a timely manner to ensure your child’s well-being.


📹 Helping kids overcome separation anxiety

It’s the moment every parent of a small child dreads, the good-bye. Here is some advice on ways to overcome separation anxiety.


Strategies For Addressing Separation Anxiety In Daycare
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Rae Fairbanks Mosher

I’m a mother, teacher, and writer who has found immense joy in the journey of motherhood. Through my blog, I share my experiences, lessons, and reflections on balancing life as a parent and a professional. My passion for teaching extends beyond the classroom as I write about the challenges and blessings of raising children. Join me as I explore the beautiful chaos of motherhood and share insights that inspire and uplift.

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21 comments

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  • My son is 3 and it started after going to the nursery. One big mistake i made (and nursery staff encouraged me to do it, unfortunately) was that when my son was playing, i sneaked out without saying bye. This made him extremely anxious, he now started following me into every room and bathroom, which he didn’t do before.

  • You have the best parenting tips and tricks on youtube! You literally think of everything! This article, like your other articles, hit home – especially this one! I was so boggled by my baby’s extreme clinginess all of a sudden (when she was generally super happy around the other care givers) – any time I would leave the room. This was around the time she mastered the object permanence ball in hole skill. This has lasted close to 3 weeks- she seems to be getting better. Thank you for all of this great info and a sense of validation!!!

  • Hi Emma, I love your articles! I think it would be interesting to see a article about the baby feelings. For example when you have a baby that cries when left playing next to you but not with you. When they want to sit but you need to change a diaper and the baby gets fussy. When you see the frustration in the baby of not being able to do something. When a baby fights sleep. And other moments that make the baby upset and how to deal with them 🙂

  • You posted this at exactly the right time for us lol. My 7 month old has been VERY attached to me. If I’m in the room, he’s near me. When I leave, he flips out. He’s been doing it for about 3 weeks now. He’s also starting to stand independently and cruise. He’s teething. So he’s also not sleeping. Poor Bubba has a lot going on lol. Thank you for making this article!

  • Thank you for the article. Now I understand why my almost 10 month old sob started being so clingy and cries everytime i leave for a few minutes. It actually started as soon i started sleep training, and he now wont let me eveb put him down, i have to be holding him most of the time. Do you think its related to sleep training and would you still think its a phase or is there something i can do. PS sleep training was a gentle one day thing not a long traumatic experience and he goes to sleep happily without fussing so i dont think he’s traumatized.

  • How do you know if it’s not just separation anxiety? My son is almost 12 months but has been like this since about 8 months. I am a single mum so he spends all day with just me. He’s only spent an hour away from me in 6 months. He starts daycare next week and I’m so worried he won’t cope. We have been doing visits to try and help and he’ll start with half days. When we’re at home though he cries every time I leave his sight and crawls after me. Sometimes he’ll cry when I move away from him even if he can still see me. He also started not wanting to sleep in his cot at the same time and wanting to sleep in my bed.

  • Hey emma i really like all your articles. They are very helpful for new mums. I have a problem . My 13 months old baby girl cruises on furniture, stands with holding things, and stands all alone for like 30 seconds and walk little steps but she is not able to pull herself from ground all by herself and hence she is hesitate to walk..how can i help her

  • I think my baby know that when the alarm goes off in the kitchen, that I’m going to leave the room for a brief time. Whenever the alarm goes of he drops whatever he’s doing, cries a little bit and runs(speed crawl) to me and holds on to me so tight! I’ve been bringing him with me and it seems to calm him a little bit.

  • My lo is finding it extremely hard to go to nursery 🙁 just turned 9 months this week and perhaps even thanks to covid he’s mainly used to his parents and his separation anxiety is through the roof. We have been going to nursery for 30 min stretching for 3 weeks now and had to pull him out for a whole week due to gastric flu 🙁 feel like a mammoth task 🙁

  • Hi Emma. Can you make a article of what are the issues that pandemic babies might face. I’m talking about babie to 2 years single child’s who doesn’t have contact with people or other kids. And what can we do to avoid those issues in regard to people and other child. I feel my baby cries when she’s close to other people I’m not sure if it’s the stage or a problem developed because she doesn’t spend time with other kids

  • My son is 8 months old. About two weeks ago, we tried to go over to my MIL’s house for dinner. He’s never been there before (she lives in a different town), and he’s only seen her and my hubby’s stepdad a few times. She of course wanted to hold him soon after we got there, and that resulted in him crying inconsolably for nearly 15 minutes. This gave me a major anxiety attack, I just wanted to take him and leave. He was probably tired (he’d only had about a 20 minute nap, in the car), and the only thing that really got him to calm down was a bottle (I believe it was a little early for food at that point but it did calm him down). After that, he was fine to just stay with me and play on his mat that we’d brought. However, she tried to hold him again, and he again started crying. How do we combat this? He cried that time for about 5 minutes, until my hubby started playing with him by whooshing him into the air. Needless to say, I’m extremely anxious now about going back over there, and we have plans to go there for Thanksgiving :/

  • Hi Emma, My sleep trained 7 month old is now experiencing seperation anxiety. This is great for wake time, but what should I be doing with a baby that now screams everytime I place her in her crib? I’ve read leaving the room (like when check and concole sleeping training) will make the anxiety worst. Would love to know your thoughts? Signed: Deperate in Canada.

  • Hi. My baby is 17months old and still have seperation anxiety to a point i cant do anything in the house. Its very stressful, i thought its just a phase but it has been so long since it started which is when she was 5 months old. Is this normal? What else can i do? But these tips really good, thank you so much. I hope she will get over this phase soon.

  • HELP!! I have a 10mo who’s been here since birth.. The family is awesome but I’ve asked them not to stay so long at drop off.. 1st time parents and I’ve talked to them about it. The only time that he’s not screaming is during nap, and feedings. His parents STILL rock him to sleep. He’s built like a 2yo and just learned how to sit up and crawl. I’m at my wits end and as many of me speaking 2 them, nothing changes..

  • Thankyou for the article.. my son is 13 months old and is attached to me so much that he doesn’t even go to his dad. So do we pick them up every time when they cry? Is that something wrong ? I keep hearing that a lot .. if you keep picking them up they get used to it ! I don’t know I just can’t stop myself from picking up when he is crying

  • My sister in laws daughter is almost two and I feel like her separation anxiety is really bad. She’s very attached to her mom and even cries when she hands her to her own father. Not just sometimes but every time. Is this normal as well? Honestly I’ve never seen a child react the way she does when her mom simply goes to shower.

  • Okay I need some super urgent help! I have done everything, my baby(10 months) is okay exploring on her own for 5 minutes but she just cries and cries and cries after that and wants to be picked and held constantly. I don’t know what to do. I am kind of a single mom – dad and family are in another country. Help if you guys have any trips

  • Hi Emma my little one is not letting me do work in the kitchen. He is ok if I am sitting near him but as soon as i go in the kitchen he will just crawling to the kitchen and stand in my legs, and started crying all the time. Which makes my life hard. I try to give him some boxes to play but he is ok for few minutes and again starting crying for me to pickup him up. Sometimes i am so frustrat about it Any tips?

  • Hi Emma, my 16 month old has just started waking up screaming for mum or dad and won’t settle for an hour or two. Her routine hasn’t changed. We recently visited family where we had to share a room. Could this have contributed? I’m at a loss of what to do. I’ve tried comforting, white noise, crying out etc but she’s always slept through so this is really rough now. I’m questioning whether it is even separation anxiety as we have spells in the day where she’s okay in another room……please offers any advice

  • Hi Emma thank you so much for the tip and it is really helpful. My son is 8 months old and we are just 2 of us at home. He used to play alone before, while I was perusal him from far. But now he needs me more and he will play by himself for a while then he started to look for me and cry. How can I do about this? Thank you

  • Ant tips on preventing anaclitic depression in toddlers? I agreed to live with my daughter & her husband to care for my now 8 month old granddaughter for one year due to the Covid-19 Pandemic. We’re all fully vaccinated, parents are back to in-office work, and baby in daycare two days per week to give me a break. I still babysit 3/12-hr days per week and worry how the baby will respond when I’m completely gone back North to my husband which is over a 4.5 hr drive one way

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