To make time for hobbies with a full-time job, set realistic goals and identify a specific hobby that you enjoy. Be realistic about how much time you can dedicate to it each week and break down your schedule accordingly. Hobbies help clear your mind, connect with your social circle, and nourish your identity. Classic Gentlemen can find over 100 hobbies suitable for them, including building, coloring, cutting, and pasting.
To find time for a hobby, consider how you spend your free time, such as working, taking care of your home, and handling responsibilities. Take it back to your childhood activities and find ways to incorporate them into your daily routine. For example, you could play video games when you’re unmarried and continue to do so during marriage.
Informal hobbies like games, cooking, traveling, hiking, and more can also be pursued together. Marriage is great fun, but hobbies can potentially overtake and ruin it if they cause spouses to feel disconnected and distanced from each other. Explore the importance of hobbies for men that bring joy, keep your mind sharp, improve your eye for detail, and help meet new friends.
Among employed US adults aged 25 to 64 and married, husbands spend about 28 hours per week on leisure, while wives spend about 26 hours on it. Shared hobbies offer a unique opportunity for couples to practice communication and problem-solving skills in a fun way. Being antisocial and not having friends or hobbies is not a flaw or shame.
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How to surprise your husband after a long day at work?
To surprise your husband, go to his workplace and surprise him with a delicious lunch, either at home or out. If you can’t stay, leave a sweet note to make him smile. Send him an all-white bouquet, as no man expects flowers. Finally, surprise him with an unexpected dare, doing something he didn’t expect, which will give you a rush and make him impressed. These simple and thoughtful gestures can make your husband’s day more enjoyable and memorable.
How do I make time for my hobbies after work?
To maintain a healthy work-life balance, it’s essential to organize your schedule and allocate time for hobbies, whether it’s after work or on weekends. Prioritize what brings you the most joy and allocate more time to those activities. Don’t beat yourself up if you have to choose between hobbies, it’s part of the game. Flexibility is also crucial, as things don’t always go as planned. Even a few minutes a day can make a difference.
Blend hobbies with other activities, such as listening to music or reading a book. If feasible, discuss your interests with your boss about maintaining a work-life balance. Together, you might find a solution to help you enjoy your hobbies more.
Why don’t I enjoy my hobbies anymore?
Disinterest can be due to feelings of uninspiration or loss of interest in old hobbies, but it can also indicate a mental health condition like depression. If this loss is making it difficult to cope or interferes with your life, it is crucial to seek help from a physician or mental health professional. Depression can worsen over time, so it is essential to seek help as soon as possible to regain your passion for the things that bring joy. Verywell Mind uses high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support its articles, ensuring accuracy, reliability, and trustworthiness.
How to know when a married man loves you?
The institution of marriage is a multifaceted entity, and it is not uncommon for men who are married to develop romantic and/or sexual feelings for other women. This phenomenon can be attributed to a number of underlying factors, including a desire for companionship, genuine concern for one’s well-being, and the sharing of personal thoughts and feelings. An understanding of these dynamics can assist in the recognition of indications of love and attraction in a married man.
How to find time for hobbies outside of work?
To effectively schedule and stick to hobbies, create a calendar and integrate them into other activities. For example, if you enjoy hiking, plan hikes with friends or family, or cook, invite friends over for dinner parties or potlucks. If you’re always on the go, choose a hobby that can be done while traveling or waiting in line. If you have more free time at night, choose a hobby that doesn’t require much equipment or setup time. Divide and conquer your hobby into smaller chunks to fit into your day. For example, if you love painting but can only dedicate an hour a week, break it into 20-minute increments.
There is always time for hobbies if you prioritize them and get creative, no matter how busy you are. Utilize technology to make finding time for your hobbies easier, as numerous apps and tools can make planning and execution easier. By prioritizing and getting creative, you can find time for your hobbies and enjoy them without feeling overwhelmed.
How do I find a hobby after work?
20 hobbies to do after work include geocaching, fishing, nature watching, gardening, hiking, aerobics, reading, and puzzles. These activities offer fresh air and nature without requiring excessive physical energy. However, important tasks can sometimes overshadow free time, making it difficult to set boundaries and dedicate time to oneself. Pursuing interests outside of work helps round out daily life, clear the mind, connect with social circles, and nourish one’s identity. Factors to consider when pursuing hobbies include time management, availability, and the importance of balancing work and personal interests.
How do I treat my wife after a long day at work?
Conversation is crucial for a successful relationship, and personal touch is the strong language of love. Spending time together, exercising, and walking down memory lane are essential. Avoiding work and phones while together, getting good sleep, and having a bucket list are also important. Working parents often prioritize good sleep, leading to a diminished bond between the partner and themselves. This can result in fulfilling duties without much love left between the two.
How do you tell if a married man is infatuated with you?
A married man may show signs of sexual attraction to you, such as nervousness, licking his lips, seeking reasons to touch you, dominant body language, spreading legs, raising eyebrows, and leaning towards you. These signs can indicate if he truly has feelings for you and if he is willing to take action or wait until the feelings fade.
Although most married people get occasional crushes, they are usually harmless and fleeting. If he is truly into you, he may struggle with his nerves when you’re nearby, displaying anxiety in the form of fidgeting, blushing, or stammering. He may also not act this way around other people, or not to the same extent. It’s important to recognize these signs and understand if he’s overstepping any boundaries or if he’s truly into you.
How long does it take for a man to realize he wants to marry a woman?
A study indicates that the average duration of a courtship is approximately six months, or 172 days, before a prospective spouse can be determined to be suitable for marriage.
How do you tell if a married man is pursuing you?
The text posits that typical behaviors observed in platonic relationships include frequent eye contact, flirtatious gestures, extended physical contact, frequent conversations about interests and hobbies, and inquiring about one’s love life. Additionally, it suggests that individuals in these relationships tend to display a heightened level of interest in each other’s lives.
How to tell if a married man is emotionally attached to you?
A married man’s emotional attachment to you can be evident through his desire to share personal details, seek your opinion on important matters, and show genuine care for your well-being. He may prioritize spending time with you over others, indicating a deeper connection than casual friendship. To tell if a married man is falling for you, he may show signs of making you a significant part of his life through frequent communication, special plans, or meaningful gestures that resonate with your interests.
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Loved this, Mat! I’m married and many of these tips I’m going to practice! “Take me out,” brilliant! “Hero size him”, amazing! Thank you. How I draw my man into his masculine… PG version- when I tell him I love how he makes me feel safe. R version- when I wear a summer dress when we go out with nothing underneath. 😉
FINALLY SOMEONE EXPLAINED!!!! I tolld my man this: ” a woman in me loves a man in you. And a man in me is in love with a woman in you”…….now i hear this publicly…woow, fantastic!!!! Its the deepest truth, and helps a lot. All people should understand this!!!!! Man, you are fantastic, helpful and soo motivational, inspirational. Simply loooooove listening to you👏❤️❤️❤️❤️
There are different kind of men, therefore there are different kinds of wants and attraction for them. Some men are looking for sugar mommy and cougar so looks doesn’t matter for them. Some men looks for beauty since they are well off and can afford a goodlooking wife. Some men are looking for just an equal because they don’t have much but just enough or just get by, so they look for somebody equal that will help them out. Attractive poor men of course are looking for rich partner, the rich unattractive men are looking for beauty. The other that are not rich and not goodlooking men they look for just an equal. Some men can take what is infront of them, but incase there is a better offer that comes in they can move and shift. Attraction doesn’t necessarily mean marriage, even if the guy is attracted with you it doesn’t mean he wants to marry you. If he is a practical person he will only want sex but will never marry you if there is no money involve. Some men wants a woman to earn her own money and help him out so even if there is attraction it won’t guarantee marriage. It will always ends up with practical reason and more convenient choices. And to think that women are now all liberated so men can just sleep with anybody they want and not marry them. Either one is a gardener or a flower. It will be a match if gardener and flower but if both wants to be the flower that won’t match, or if both are gardener it can work too but sometimes there’s issue. But of course first things we see is physical attraction we look when we see somebody goodlooking.
I follow what Mat is saying – I’m willing to give it a try. This all seems sort of manipulative…I’ve never been the type to play mind games with someone’s emotions. Any suggestions on how to get past the discomfort of behaving this way? My husband might respond to this, but he grew up surrounded by a tight knit group of drama prone females. I often think, “Geez, he’s the temperamental woman in this relationship!” He watches those ridiculous “Real Housewives” shows – I think because he’s comforted by the drama, whereas I can’t stand more than 5 minutes of perusal that infantile behavior. I’m a very straight forward, go-getter kind of woman…pretty much the opposite of a needy diva. I’m not sure how to make Mat’s approach work with my personality and my husband’s norms. Should I ask him to carry heavy stuff for me, or what? He’s provided a phenomenal lifestyle for us. (I leave him post-it notes of thanks & encouragement and I see that he does stash those away. :o) I’d like my relationship dynamic to change – 30 years of a moody husband is a bit tiresome. Some pampering would be nice, and I think he’d do that for me if I give him some direction. Comments and suggestions welcome.
Hi Mat!!! Really loving your content!!! Can you please address talk about the male/female/yang/yin energies in the Work place? As a PROFESSIONAL woman, I find that I prefer to work for and with PROFESSIONAL men. Is that odd? I notice that 99% of women get sooo catty and petty, and manipulative. I prefer the straightforward way men think and perform at work. Most Professional Men tend to be goal-oriented, while most women, sorry to say, get sidetracked and start compromising their integrity and get distracted by gossip and nonsense. Why is that ?
I love the content but wouldn’t you agree the foundation for these tips to flourish starts with a natural sense that the other is a match? Think of your best friends, for example. How do you feel when you’re with them, and when you leave them? You feel great, even if the environment or narrative shifts to conversations out of your direct control. If you feel safe and happy with company, your best self will shine and allow the other to do the same. Reciprocity in authenticity is the most underrated aspect in finding your person/people. ❤
This was all great advice..wow!! I have experienced everything you have said and you are 💯 % correct. Ive done some of the corrective things you said before this article and they worked most times, but I learned a new aspect and approach from this article and now I totally understand. Even some of the men wld tell me exactly what you said, as far as the masculine energy, i never quite understood what i was doing wrong exactly or how to fix it or make the right adjustments in the way you describes. Thx so much for sharing this knowledge. Much appreciated ❤️
Why is it that women need to do all the work to please the man but he’s not required to make changes in order to be a good partner for her? I’m a senior now and I’ve had a lot of experience with relationships with men including being married once. Frankly, I’m tired of always being the one in the relationship to work at making it happen like this article expects me to do. I’ve been single now for a long time and I’ve never been happier! All the work I do now is for me, my life and my satisfaction not to get a man to behave like a man, which he should know how to do with or without me. One male friend, while visiting me, got all misty and told me he should marry a woman like me… I told him to get out and not to come back!!! I really really really don’t want another relationship and if a man goes there it’s over.
I have spent 38 years saying would you take me out. Can we go out. Let’s turn this around. What would make me feel good is for once in his life he would say would you like to go out. Hey let’s go out to this restaurant. He never takes initiative to ever want to even give me a break of a night cooking by offering. I’ve always had to suggest it
Thanks for these tips. unfortunaly black men don’t get it and often times miss the feminine mark of sensuality from a woman. now days black men like to be pursued by the ladies where am from. this to me causes a feminine woman to step into her masculine roll. it’s very daunting and discouraging in dating for me.
A strong feminine in any person is ACTIVELY RECEPTIVE. It says, ” I know who I am and there is room for you.” The passive person who says “I don’t know what I want, you choose” or the dominating person who says “I get to decide everything” is not someone in balance or mature. The passive model is what most people still mistakenly think of as “feminine” and many men like “feminine” women in this mode of submission. An immature man who needs a pat on the head for everything is also not someone with a strong center.
Every day I strive with great effort to make sure I am NEVER seductive and do the exact opposite of everything proposed here. And the more I remain in a clean, wholesome, NON-seductive, androgynous asexual energy, the more guys show interest in me. Most guys don’t want that “feminine” energy anymore. They don’t want the full burden of leadership anymore, they want more of an equal partner. If I had to diminish and polarize myself in order to “make” a man feel like a man, then in essence, I’m controlling him and would have too much power over him, and that would totally turn me off.
What if you ask something you really really would love him to do for you (a simple thing, not asking for a trip on an asteroid or something alike) and he promises but never keep his promise? I mean I waited 4 years to him for hanging my favourite painting in the sitting room, and ended up doing it myself… 🙁
Oh man I got a good story but I’ll try to keep it brief. I had been dating a fairly feminine man to the point where I was more masculine in the relationship and I was doing EVERYTHING. Well, a man I’ve known for 9 years ended up working for me in March of this year. Him and I have always had a good working relationship and have trust and respect with each other, he’s much more masculine, but as a single dad to a girl and a boy, he also has to play into his femininity at times as well. Well come the end of May, I make the decision that I’m going to leave the company and my relationship with my boyfriend. So I’m standing at my employees desk and about 30 minutes pass and I realize I need to get back to work, but then this just comes out of my mouth from no where “my boyfriend really needs to go put those desk chairs together in the other office”….. THIS MAN gets up out of his desk and is on his way to put one together for me before I even realize what I said! Then he came in the next day (on a day he works remote) and put the other one together. Well, he is coming in the office for me, so I put makeup on for him AND HE NOTICED. He goes “Kaitlyn, you’re wearing makeup today” and I say “yes” and he goes “WHY are you wearing makeup today?” And I say “to deal with all of this shit” pointing to my monitors/computer. And he goes “you look NICE!” 😉😉😉 I mean, it’s just about my favorite story of all time. My boyfriend had taken a lot of my confidence away from me, he kept me small so I wouldn’t leave.
I was meeting this guy who I’ve been dating for dinner. As I was walking from the parking lot to the restaurant, he was also walking towards the restaurant. Instead of walking towards him, I stopped and waited for him so we could walk together. I could’ve easily walked to him, but I made him come to where I am, increasing my feminine and his masculine energy.
No doubt there are differences between men and women, but what you are advocating feels very manipulative. Like playing a game without a lot of honesty. You gave me some food for thought, but after almost 50 years of marriage, just feeling very thankful that we’ve grown together and it just gets better in all our interactions. Being considerate is a big part and that means sometimes I decide the restaurant choice, sometimes he does. It doesn’t detract or add to feminine or masculine side of the equation.
I’ve used the Hero tool. It’s powerful. I asked my man to fix my bicycle for me. When he was done I said, “you are my hero you just fixed my bike and provided me with so much joy because I can ride my bike now.” When I said, “you’re my hero” I saw his chest puff out and his arms raise like he was super man. He had the biggest smile on his face. It was awsome!!! Yes ladies let’s “Hero Size Him not Criticize Him”
I would have bought into this at a different time. However having learned that this is a game of pretending to be someone I am not isn’t right. Stbx is a narcissist who made sure women were to be less than. A woman has to be who she is, if that intimidates man than oh well. Been there done that lived the nightmare.
Yeah, making him a hero is all fine. After 20 years of always praising and making him the hero… it would be great to receive a little bit of that in return. At least a small bit of recognition for the multitude of things that I do would be really nice. He doesn’t criticize but he doesn’t offer any recognition, acknowledgment, or appreciation in return. Guess what has happened … making him a hero has stopped. When he feeds the dogs I thank him and tell him I appreciate it. Do I get that back? No. I’m done with making him my hero.
Do simple things if you tend to fall on the masculine side. Like NEVER make a move to open a door for yourself. Not even a car door. 99.9% of men will pick up on this and enjoy opening doors for you. My current boyfriends last girlfriend was very masculine take charge type and I’m very feminine let him take charge. So it took him a while to adjust but I can tell he enjoys the way I make him feel more manly when we are together.
Theres something very wrong with a lot of men these days. They just dont want any responsibility. Against this backdrop the relatively smaller number of men that are actually relationship material have so many options that women end up competing for their attention, which makes these women masculine and kills true, lasting attraction and love. I think the real root cause is the relatively small number of non toxic men
Interesting info thanks…..in a nut shell tho it sounds like we need to be constantly feeding the ego of & patronising men….is that what men REALLY want?? I can understand doing that for a child (of any sex) to help them grow into a confident secure adult….but surely men should have reached that stage by the time they’re all grown up!!! 🤔😂
This was very good and very interesting. I’m in a 31 yr marriage and have made it through some very difficult years/experiences. I agree with these three tips totally, but what if they don’t work? I unknowingly have used these three tips over the years, but my husband stays more in his comfortable feminine zone. He doesn’t mind that. Advice??
Here is my full on Honesty. I am not married, nor am I dating. my age as of right now is 18 turning 19 this year. I am a growing Young lady who is trying to figure out what to do as of now in my life. And again, saying with honesty, I have been feeling sad, lonely, and I have found myself wanting to fall in love and have a Boyfriend. I am trying to figure how to ask this, but who ever reads this comment. Is there any Ideas, or tips, that I could use, to hopefully find my true love..? 🥺🥺🥺
That first example does not really work in the real world. Years ago a guy picked me up to go out to dinner. The minute I got in the car he asked me, “Where do you want to go?” My reply to him was, “I don’t care where we go or what we eat. As long as we are together, I will leave it up to you to decide. I will find something to eat where ever you choose to take me.” I had been making hard decisions at work the entire day and I just didn’t want to have to make any more decisions. We drove around for 45 minutes in a restaurant district passing literally DOZENS of restaurants. All the while he kept asking, “Where do you want to go?” And I kept replying, “I don’t care, wherever you choose.” Finally, the last time he asked me, “Where do you want to go?” My reply was, “I want to go home, right now.” He took me home and that was the last time I went out with him.
I do all of that but unknowingly. 1st one – not shifting to masculine energy is mostly because iam too indecisive always was so I dont even try to lead. Complimenting is also good Ig mrn dont get complimented that much smh nor do they expect it. Its not just for men though everyone needs to feel like their efforts are acknowledged and validated its a human need. Only criticism will make it worse cause anyone would feel like its useless to even try to help then
If, on the first date, your wife had indicated a place she liked or thought you might like, would you have liked her less…found her less attractive because she didn’t help you have your feelings of masculinity boosted? So…what attracted you to her was not her, per se, but her femininity? This just sounds like old school rhetoric framed in more modern terms. Hero-size him. Give me a break. It’s all just a fake gender dance. Be who you are and find someone who loves you for who you are, not someone who needs to be puffed up by your hero worship.
We are not your moms we have better things to do than hero size men. We are equal in the relationship. You have to communicate with the man and have fun smile and listen to your intuition. Some men think they are heros but they are controlling and and the contrary too. So let’s just be humans with positive vibes and education and respect without all the clichees around men and women.
Iam a normal real, traditional woman and I liked your article. However, I almost gave it a dislike and was going to click off because of all the seeming “woke” verbiage. It seems now that you are trying to be respectful to everyone ( even woke people) while still attempting to communicate male and female needs. Many feminists view gender differences ( ie male and female as victimizing). They don’t see it as you say a difference in energy.
Like you said, it was NOT your town, so she pressured you into “confidence without clarity” knowing if luck was not on you side you would look like a FOOL!!!! like a guy navigating a room with the lights OUT! Without the CLARITY of knowing the rooms layout, if he makes it across the room, it WAS SHEAR LUCK! “Confidence without clarity is a fools game”…Sadguru With all due respect, sounds like she displayed a liking for HEAD-GAMES from the start!! Robert (M.S. behavior psychology at Beth Israel Hospital)
This was great insight. I have a lot of masculine energy and have worked in male dominated careers all my life. I realize very early on that acting assertive energy repels and cause friction with men. Step back and gently suggest rather than demand makes for a smoother outcome. For example, friends of our husbands took us to a famous horse park and the men got lost going back to the car. My friend who is retired from the military started to direct them and they became agitated. I shot her a look to shush. We wandered around a bit following them until they stopped to figure out where they were and I asked, ” didn’t we come in by the trucks?” We let them lead us back to the car, allowed them to take care of us and save face. If we had insisted on our way they would have felt diminished and not able to take care of their friend’s wives.
I personally dont think a female can do anything different to make a man be a certain way. He either is or isnt. He is raised to be a certain way or isnt. My mistake has been, not paying attention to this. I should have paid more attention to how a man lives when he is not in a relationship. You cant make him be a certain way, he already is
Could you do a article on how to constructively criticize a man in an effective way? It’s frustrating when they have done something wrong, and you don’t know how to say it without the guy getting defensive/angry about it. Whatever happened to collaborative problem solving? Seems like no matter how tactful you are, they get so sensitive and dramatic about any feedback.
Unfortunately my husband ignores all of what he said. I used to thank and compliment my husband all the time and I meant it. He just ignored me and didn’t even acknowledge that I had said anything. He is not the man I married. The only thing he pays attention to is when I do housework. He doesn’t thank me for it, he just acknowledges what else I could do.
What happens if you drop those ‘invitations’ like I would love to go on a romantic date this weekend and then he doesn’t do it and doesn’t do any of the invitations? It almost sets the woman up for disappointment and when she drops so many hints the temptation is to then spell it out. So what happens if the guy does not follow through on doing the masculine roles?
We always say thank you on everything and that is something my husband taught me while we were dating. I didn’t understand why we had to say thank you for doing the dishes or making food because someone has to do it and it’s for both of us, so why the need. But over time when one of us forget to say it (because we are tired from our newborn daughter), the other one remembers it in a sweet/funny/kind way and it even becomes a game or a joke. We have been saying thank you to each other I don’t know how many times per day for more than 7 years and it’s a great habit to have the fortifies our love <3
I love giving my husband a set of cards every Valentines with things he can use during the year, for example: a massage, have a pic-nic, a kiss every hour today, 3 huge hugs, I love you note or something more complex… You can do how many you want (I usually do 12-24) and you can make up whatever activities he/she likes are you like. It’s an inexpensive gift and it’s always welcome. If you change it up every ear it’s also different all the time. And it’s a lot of small gifts into one <3 We have been doing this for more than 7 years and some years we both do it other years it's just me but I always put some activities that I like too =D Loved the article, thanks for sharing please do more <3
Hello, we have been together for 8 years and we have never stopped dating no matter what even if we live together for 5 years now. It break the rutine and that “we are only roommates” feeling better than anything else. But these days I´m finishing my degree and we are stuggling with our relatioship so this article is exactly what I need <3 thank you for your tips