Narcissists often use manipulation tactics, such as saying hurtful things and passing them off as a joke. Overcoming this can involve listening to oneself, setting boundaries, and refusing to engage in verbal combat. It is important for people to be proactive about protecting themselves from narcissistic abuse and victim syndrome.
Living life with a narcissist can be emotionally draining and frustrating, negatively impacting health. Limit interactions with a narcissist whenever possible and prioritize self-care. Narcissistic abuse and victim syndrome can have lasting effects on individuals, including labeling, instigating crazy-making arguments, and abandoning victims in foreign countries. Narcissistic leaders and their victims suffer most from low self-esteem and core self-evaluations.
Narcissistic victim syndrome describes the mental, emotional, and other consequences a person may experience due to a relationship with an abusive person with narcissistic personality. Victims should not be apologetic to a narcissist, as they take maximum benefit in such situations. Biweekly asking a narcissist thread for visitors/codependents can help manage their narcissism.
Narcissists only play victim when necessary, and once things are going well for them, they swell up and become overt. The narcissist ebbs and ebbs, and the enabler might be a covert narcissist.
Narcissists do not have to display all of the traits associated with the full blown pathological stage of narcissism to do untold harm. They exclude the subtleties of reason in their thinking processes, making it difficult for them to understand and deal with their behavior.
📹 5 Hidden Habits Of Covert Narcissists
Rebecca Zung is an attorney who has been recognized as one of the Top 1% of attorneys in the country having recognized as a …
How does the narcissist react when he realizes you no longer care?
Narcissism is a spectrum of behavior that can range from coercive and manipulative to coercive and potentially aggressive. It is a deep-rooted issue that can be difficult to recognize and change. Dr. Jeffrey Young developed schema therapy to help those who are resistant to narcissism, and it helps understand the root cause of their behavior. This therapy helps us understand how a narcissist reacts when they cannot control, and can help individuals navigate the challenges of managing their narcissistic tendencies.
How narcissists try to destroy you?
A narcissist can effectively undermine a person’s self-esteem through a process of grooming, which may entail manipulating the individual into questioning their own feelings, instilling feelings of shame about their best qualities, and fostering a sense of dependency. An awareness of these tactics can assist individuals in identifying them and, if necessary, extricating themselves from the situation without significant adverse consequences.
How do narcissists punish their victims?
Narcissistic abuse can manifest in various forms, such as withholding money, sex, communication, or affection, and emotional blackmail. It can also lead to anxiety, ADHD, bipolar disorder, depression, grief, narcissism, OCD, personality disorders, and PTSD. Other common forms of abuse include dating, marriage, sex and intimacy, infidelity, anger, burnout, stress, sleep, meditation, mindfulness, and yoga.
When a narcissist cuts you off?
Narcissists can have a significant impact on mental health, leading to feelings of upset, use, sadness, or rejection. They are manipulative and can also result in financial or professional losses. Narcissists often return to maintain control, often using a temporary discard as a tactic to devalue the person and demonstrate their lack of need. Their goal is to make the person realize they have little meaning to them and that it is up to them to earn their attention. This final discard is often after the narcissist believes they have nothing more to gain from the person.
Do narcissists realize they hurt people?
Those with narcissistic personality traits may prioritize self-focused motivations, prioritizing the elevation of their status over the consideration of others’ feelings. Although they may display outward signs of emotion, such as crying, experiencing regret, remorse, or sadness, these displays often lack empathy. Despite being aware of the distress they are causing to others, they may not be concerned about the resulting consequences.
What destroys a narcissist?
Breaking a narcissist’s heart involves focusing on what brings you happiness, flaunting your life’s progress, setting boundaries, ignoring their manipulation, denying their desires, staying calm, and cutting off contact if possible. Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is characterized by a lack of empathy, an overinflated ego, and a sense of entitlement. Only a qualified psychologist can diagnose NPD, but if you suspect someone has narcissistic qualities and have hurt you, it’s important to live your best life as the best revenge.
Go after what you truly want without worrying about their opinion. They may try to undermine you and make you feel less important than you are. Make choices that feel right to you and avoid giving them control over your life. The best thing to do is move on, making choices that feel right to you and following your intuition.
In summary, living your best life is the best revenge for a narcissist, and it’s crucial to follow your intuition and make choices that feel right for you.
How does a narcissist punish you after a breakup?
Blocking a CN on social media can provide peace by cutting them out of your life. However, CNs often respond poorly to being blocked, leading to narcissistic injury and rage. Narcissists are black and white thinkers, assuming people in their lives are either all good or all bad. Once you cause narcissistic injury, their hatred and resentment may come out in full force. If they believe they can get more supply from you or you have seen the mask drop, they may leave you alone.
However, if they still need to control you and punish you, they may launch a smear campaign, verbally or physically abuse, send their enablers to harass, or stalk you. Remember that you are not crazy and are not making up. Covert narcissism is insidious and subtle, making social media an ideal place for CNs to engage in emotional and psychological abuse. This article aims to help you spot these tactics and remove yourself from their orbit.
What is the last trick of a narcissist?
Individuals with narcissistic personality traits frequently employ the discard tactic to diminish their partner’s sense of self-worth and gradually erode their emotional stability. This strategy often culminates in the abrupt dissolution of the relationship, devoid of any explanation or warning, with the objective of undermining the individual’s sense of identity and autonomy.
When a narcissist sees you cry?
Narcissists may become angry when they see someone cry, causing them to feel shame or lose control over their emotions. They may react with aggression to regain control and suppress shame. Frequent crying may be annoying for them, as they lack empathy to understand and care about your emotions. They may be tired of pretending to care or disgusted by your “weakness” and may suggest you stop crying or toughen up.
What hurts a narcissist after a breakup?
Individuals with narcissistic personality traits frequently experience distress as a result of the cessation of a source of gratification rather than the dissolution of the relationship itself. This is because they tend to view the relationship as a means of obtaining a desired state of being, and thus experience a sense of loss when this source of gratification is removed.
What are the 5 things to never do after breaking up with a narcissist?
In the aftermath of a narcissist breakup, it is advisable to refrain from communication, monitoring their social media activity, isolating oneself, hastily entering into a new relationship, and neglecting professional assistance.
📹 When a narcissist sees you as being too strong, this is what they’ll do | NPD | Narcissism
When a narcissist sees you as being too strong, this is what they’ll do | NPD | Narcissism …
The thing that ultimately defeats a narcissist is their own Karma. What they put out always returns to them….if not in an an exact form, then in a form of equal value….I’ve seen it time and again, and beyond coincidence. Remember, the world is your mirror, what you see is the result of your beliefs, intentions, thoughts and actions. If you don’t like what you see in your experience, then change your beliefs, thoughts, or intentions and actions and your world and people around you will change…it’s physics.
Many heartfelt hugs to all who are suffering due to someone’s NPD. I thought I had the worst situation, but after reading the comments on this page, my heart goes out especially to those who have really horrible situations, especially situations involving kids. GROUP HUG INSERTED HERE FOR ALL WHO’VE BEEN DEGRADED, USED, ABUSED, AND STRESSED OUT TO THE MAX BY NPD.
I ignore my narcissistic husband, when he tries to berate me I put my fingers in my ears. I have moved out of the bedroom, I keep my door locked, I only speak when it’s absolutely necessary. Meanwhile I’m living my best life and preparing for divorce. I don’t think anyone should learn how to live with a narcissist. They are very sick individuals that only an act of God can heal. RUN!!!
Do the exact opposite of whatever they insist you be, say, behave, etc. Don’t cater to them, say what you mean, mean what you say. When they exceed your boundaries, take immediate action. Don’t lose your cool. When they start yapping, take your keys and leave. You do have control. Do not share your goals, dreams, ambitions. They will thwart your efforts. If you pay attention, are generous and complimentary to others be prepared for jealousy and backlash. Do NOT intertwine you monies. Be prepared to leave in a planned and well timed way. If you are divorcing them, it’ll be a circus, they try to bankrupt you. They are toxic people, they erode your self-confidence, will keep you off-balance and make you question yourself. If you turn the table on them, it’s a bit scary as you feel like to are taking on THEIR traits. Do what you need to do. Protect yourself, be smart, and keep in mind they encourage learned helplessness. It makes you more dependent on them. These energy vampires will suck the energy out of you and it takes a toll on your mental, emotional and psychological health. Educate yourself about these soulless meat suits walking the earth.
The one thing that a narcissist hates is when you show them proof of something they’ve done to others around you in front of the narcissist. That just infuriate the living hell out of them. This way, everyone sees the narcissist true colors and it’s never pretty. But the narcissist has to deal with it, and you don’t, so don’t apologize, period a narcissist doesn’t deserve one.
The only way to deal with a Narcissist is to ignore them completely and stay one step ahead of their BS, their flying monkeys, and their water bugs… Keep your family and friends far away because the narcissist will want to follow you to all your gatherings. Leave them home alone to deal with themselves. The less people they know, the better you are. They will only do to your friends what they have done to you.
Before I was with the narc,I was a super strong woman, he beat me down mentally and emotionally, it was never physical,we disagreed on things,but his anger never got out of control,he was either too scared of me or he hid it. When he discarded me,I felt like I was trash and have been working on my self esteem and loving myself for 8 months since the discard. Turning your back away from the narc is not easy, bc they manipulated you into thinking you were their number 1 and would not leave you,as a result of that they love bomb you and form a trauma bond with you,so you feel stuck and you won’t want to leave them. They are not worth your breath and I’m sorry they are a waste of space on this earth,they’re very evil and enjoy leashing physical and emotional and mental pain on you. RUN FROM THE NARC!!! YOU ARE JUST A MEANS TO AN END!!! YOU ARE AN OBJECT TO THEM,NOT A PERSON.
The best antidote for a narcissist and generally what everyone should have before going into any relationship is knowing that you are enough. Let the earth shake with your self-worth and let every fiber of your being bear witness with you that you are ENOUGH. Anybody that cannot see you in this light should not be allowed access into your life. Period. Having being a victim of narcissistic abuse, I honestly cannot wish it on my enemy. No one deserves to go through the mental trauma this thing brings.
You’re right! They enjoy perusal you plead to be understood. I explained myself for decades to my narc dad and sister in so many ways that my intentions were good when I was accused of doing something and found myself at wits end constantly. It took me to my late 50’s to realize they don’t want to “understand” and they liked perusal me defend myself. It was like their feeding frenzy. The cognitive dissonance is awful. Especially when it’s your blood family of origin, and they lie, embellish and make you the bad guy….always 😢
Thank you for your articles. With an Overt Narcissist first he may make promises to change then when that does not work, aggression, and physical violence. He will try to get you back under his control by any means necessary. You are his property no matter how many times he has cheated and left you. I had to leave the state making it more difficult for him to have access to me. This narc traveled to where I was living 5 states away and tried to drag me back cave man style. I have read that the lesser narcissist has poor cognitive function and low impulse control. Some are even capable of rape when they suffer a narcissistic injury. While I believe all narcissist can lash out violently when enraged and suffering from a narcissistic injury it is even more so with the lesser. My experience with this narcissist was even if we separated and he had moved on with a new supply source he would still come around to make sure I was not seeing anyone. If I happened to start dating he became violent even when he was engaged with someone new. Most narcissist when they are love bombing a new supply source will not want the one they discarded in the picture at least in the beginning of his new relationship. If they are engaged with a new supply source and still Hoovering you for fuel they have a sadistic streak. This narcissist cheated throughout the entire marriage. He engaged in triangulation with his first wife. She was a constant in our marriage until her suicide. The Covert Narcissist may try to come back after they have been involved in a few relationships which did not work out.
All men and women learn to love yourself so you wont hurt others, sometimes we is the narcissist without even knowing by child hood trauma or bad relationships who taught us these self sabotaging ways. Learn that you have full abundance inside your soul and enjoy being alone. Alone isn’t loneliness its self bliss. Then once you have healed go out and attract vibes that matches your flow of energy that you set already in your presence 💯
About 26 years late on the advice. By the time I left my narcissist I couldn’t even think a coherent thought. I was a mess and ended up homeless for a while with my kids. People would ask isn’t it time for me to go back. I told them I would rather die than go back. Fine now, own my home and its peaceful when you’re not being controlled 24/7
Took me 40-something years to realize my lil old Black mother, who sits in the front pew at church, is a narcissist. As Black children—especially male children—we are not taught to be critical of our mothers. Society teaches us to rip our Black fathers to shreds; but we never examine our mother’s behavior… Furthermore, the stereotype of a narcissist is that of a well-educated, sophisticated, successful white male. But there are a lot of Black mothers with high school diplomas working as secretaries and grocery store cashiers who are narcissists.
If you absolutely have to “deal” with a narc, I would recommend to keep firm bounderies, and keep your distance at the same time. As a second choose on how to deal with the narcissist I would recommend keeping firm boundaries and also to correct them every time they missteps, lie, manipulates etz. When your boundaries are not respected by the narcissist, you need to follow through with consequenses of bad behaviour. You will have your hands full going forward this way. When following through with consequenses to their “re”actions, you explain to the narc, that you are not one of the narc`s victims. You have no intentions of becoming one but will be a nuisance to the narcissist in a way that is irritating to him/her. This method is not risk free but narcissists will often choose the path of no or low resistance. This method is a time consuming path to chose. This route sometimes require more time than you would like to spend on these issues. You feel that distancing yourself all together would have been easier. That is however not always possible. Often there is no way to avoid him/her. You unfortunately have to deal with the narcissist because you are colleagues or close family. You must think through what you need the narcissist to respect and what arias of conflict you must pay extra attention to, to keep your integrity and to detect manipulative behavior. Be prepared and clear in your communication and stick to your guns. Try to stay under the radar as much as you can, even when this method is the best for you.
As an adult I got very sick and had to move home for several years. My father has always been abusive. I started standing up to him and after him telling me twice that he would hit me in the face if I didn’t shut up, I left and called the police. I had warned him not to threaten me and if he did I would call the police (big tactical error on my part). I found out later that he called attorneys and was going to try to claim ELDER abuse. They are total cowards and will go to any lengths to destroy you.
“The narcissist’s goal is to gain their trust, so they may treat them like mindless servants.” Yes. This is where I have blindy been in my marriage the last 19 years. I always wondered why he never trusted me, why he treated me like a lower being that wasn’t capable of standing in my own two feet. Constantly criticizing, making me feel stupid. Cutting down my self esteem and being verbally and emotionally abusive. His needs always came first and he always had some logical reason why they should. It makes me sick that he did this to me and that it took me so long to try and get out with my kids. Narcissists are controlling, underhanded, two-faced lying a-holes who will suck the life of of you until you literally have nothing left to give, and then they will try to take more. Don’t let it get as far as I did.
It’s an unbelievable thing to read the comments below and realize that people who are strangers to me are going through the SAME, EXACT THINGS I’m going through. I can tell by reading one-sentence comments the types of CRAP this person has gone through. My heart goes out to all who are suffering and victimized by narcissism.
If you think you may be with a narcissist, get out and run as fast as you can. You may feel love for them and it may hurt to leave but it’s the best thing you can do for your own well-being. Give them the chance and they will do their best to destroy you, your relationships with family and friends and you will end up doubting your own sanity.
I worked with a woman who lied a lot. She needed attention and tried to make it so that she got attention. I stayed quiet and in the back so when I showed up all the little old ladies would get excited and wanted to chat- it drove the other woman nuts! She would give “compliments” that were really underhanded jabs. I recognized that acting like it was too smart and over my head for me to understand she was just testing me and trying to belittle me by constantly volunteering advice. Much easier to act stupid and save myself effort and time. Meanwhile my boss was completely fine with how I did my business. I feel bad for that lady because she is getting pretty old now and must reflect a bit. It’s been some years now since I’ve seen her. So thank goodness!
Accuse you of being controlling when you ask to be treated with respect and dignity and kindness. Accuse you of being manipulative when you express your pain or cry when they mistreat you. Try to convince you that you are in the wrong for feeling like they don’t care when they clearly show no empathy and refuse to change the behaviors that are hurting you. Will give the silent treatment or just completely stonewall you when you point out any wrong doing that they have committed. 😢I know from experience and it slowly kills you inside. It strips away every bit is self confidence and self value and leaves you so empty and feeling weak.. it’s psychologically damaging. You will question your own reality and wonder if you really are the crazy one if you really are the problem. And yet it’s only with them that you react the way you do and it’s only with them that you feel so low.
One of the biggest and easiest things to see quickly and notice without fail is that they have severe immediate Amnesia when it comes to remembering the wrongdoings or misgivings that they may have done only a day or even a hour before. And the inflated sense of ego. – thats the two best advising comments.
My Dad is narcissist, when i was young à give him more attention to be loved and accepted, my mom was full of love and i was’nt giving attention to her… not as much. Humain want to be loved and accepted so when we are in a ego state we will stick to the narcissist more than others. When you wake up (spirit, soul) and detach from your ego you let the narcissist go because they don’t change and know you see… humain are Easy to manipulate and control in an ego state.
Triage technique: they cultivate a connection in order get leverage and try to turn someone close to you – a client, a colleague – against you. They look for a chance or create a scenario to allow them do that, often playing victim at the same time. Yep, been on the end of that one. They are pure trouble and controlled by malicious entities. Best and only recourse generally – if its possible – is to leave their orbit before they do too much damage.
The narc that keeps putting herself into my life, is a women that has no connection to me at all. She has gone on spreading rumors in the community about how I live my life, even convincing some that I should not shop during the day (I work nights). She has told different people differant reasons why they should shun or harras me. Luckly, many people now, are recognizing her body language when she makes up these stories (she will start breathing heavy like she just ran a race, talking real fast, then ending with a sad story of some reason why shes not doing what ever I am doing). This is baffling to my friends as she is not someone in my life, rather an acquaintance in the community.
When you understand them, you can turn their games around on them. The best situation is when they try to turn others against you, then you use that same group to expose the person by reverse engineering their game (they’ll plant seeds against you and act like they are the victim, so you only say good things about them and defend them against the people that start to come to you with bits of info), so the group that was supposed to be used as a tool for them doesn’t work. Also, doing the opposite reaction of what was intended by their set ups. It scrambles their computers 🖥
My mother-in-law is a narcissist. Every time she visits, it’s so emotionally draining and overwhelming. At first I had no idea what was going on, I didn’t understand what was happening…. I’ve only recently began to discover what this was all about. More people need to talk about this and make this known. It plays with your mind, that’s for sure. Thank you for your vid and your information.
He starts a fight while I’m reading a book or quietly perusal documentary!! Just nasty attacks for no reason…Then when I defend myself, he gets I my face even more telling me to grow up, stop raising my voice and to stop disrespecting his home. He will yell loud enough for the neighbors to hear S if you influence them to believe I’m such a problem. Then 2 hours later, he’s like,”Hey come watch a movie with me…”
Not only was this the most accurate description of a narcissist, it is sad to see in the comments, just how many people’s lives have been destroyed by a relationship with a narcissist. My own experience has proved that the narcissist will never stop. You must do whatever necessary to regain your sanity and freedom, but they will never stop. It truly is a sickness for which the narcissist will never get help because they don’t see that they are the problem. Distance yourself from them the best you can. It helps to see this as a sickness and don’t hate them for it. It can be an opportunity to set a new path for yourself which will undoubtedly be better than the one you were on.
They continue to abuse and terrorize their children into adulthood, seeing them as personal property whose purpose in life is merely to shower them with adoration and to relentlessly cater to them while taking the blame for everything. The rage when an adult child refuses to comply with them and imposes consequences for their disgusting behaviour is spectacularly unhinged; facts simply don’t matter to these people, and you cannot convince them that their children even have basic human rights they have to respect.
Mine had all his family ignore me from day one. No congratulations on our wedding. Later he told me he’d told everyone not to give us anything. Obviously he lied about me paying for everything. What I didn’t know was that in his culture the man and his family pay. I found out many years later when one of my female students was getting married. He succeeded in always isolating me and shared only disinformation. He never had an answer, even about his own culture. But once I asked a pastor’s wife about the different types of teas. She didn’t even get one word out before he suddenly interrupted and explained in detail! The expression on her face when she saw my 😮surprise showed she knew what was going on. She asked me to attend her church, but my husband quickly got me away from her, insisted I go with him to the car. I was confused, didn’t want to make a scene, especially since friends had taken us there to meet her and her husband. It was useless bringing it up because he’d only change the topic and/or ignore me. For so many years his entire relationship with me was nothing but deceit. However, after separating, I came upon these articles and now I finally understand. I have to stay in contact because he controls all the finances and my visa to stay abroad. But I’m so thankful for the miracle that got me away so I would then find these kinds of articles to learn from. If not, I would never have known. I am so grateful for each of the messages shared with us. They not only are helping our mental, physical, and spiritual but also reinforcing how beautiful we are.
The number one trick to control a narcissist is to make them always they are so bore to yu, never hear them, make them feel yu are ignoring them, sometimes do not answer their questions always even if its valid or not, make a feel of boring with yu, try their behave often when dealing with them, always make them yu as not available, when they try to love bombing, make a yarn and say them without words that keep it in with yu, we cannot always run away from them in the case of family members, take this tricky capsule when dealing with them. Narcissist always win when they are able to hurt yu, so kerp in mind. Live with happy around them. If they try to give yu bad label just feel them as yu are very grateful with that label and be like a devil in front of them. Always put a mask of never mind set.
Everything said was Sooooo true. I’m married to one and learned the hard way how deceiving he is but thank God for all the lessons. Because of articles like this I’ve learned to ignore him. I do not reward bad behavior, I show no emotions of disappointment just being happy and in love with myself. I find it strange he won’t leave therefore I let him pay all the bills and I live as a single woman.
Everything about this is absolutely correct. I’ve done a bit of research on narcissism, because it happened to me. It’s almost 12 years since I left a sociopathic psycho (which is a form of narcissism) after 5 years of living hell. He abused me in every way; emotionally, verbally, psychologically, and yes, physically. The beatings were bad, but the psychological abuse was worse- the controlling, the fear, the threats…. And always making himself look like the perfect husband whilst dragging me down to his level and slowly dragging me away from my family and friends. Thank you for listening. Thank you so much for sharing this. I truly hope this helps whom ever needs to hear what you’ve said.
I’m going through this right now with a guy at my job. I realized that he was a snake and cut all ties from him. He’s been trying to contact me. Various ways for over a year and a half now non stop. When I continue to refuse conversation with him. He chose to spread rumors about me throughout my coworkers. Many of those coworkers are his monkeys That help him Come after me. Anyone in this situation Needs to stand their ground because the attacks will never stop.
You completely described my ex. Thank you so much it feels so good to see I am not alone in facing such trauma. I was with a lot of girls before her but it was my first time ever with a narcissist and I had no idea all those love bombing me was just an act. She stole and she cheated just like you described.
Guys! I am two weeks out of moving out of a bad situation with a narcissist and it’s been the most positive and happy two weeks I’ve had in years in spite of how stressed I am! Edit: 5 weeks out and it has gotten sooooo much better even more! I feel more myself, less anxious, less stressed and mentally chaotic, and it’s been so nice not having heard hateful things said to me in over a month.
Was married to one,everything you said is true, but until you realise what is going on&that there is a pattern repeat to their behaviours you just struggle to get free,they switch roles&gaslight you til you are doubting yourself and the revelation of who they truly are becomes blurred again. No contact is vital for your own well being&sanity,time to heal&recover from this traumatic experience. Well done to all who escaped,freedom is so precious&now you can share your love with many,instead of being sucked dry by one!!!
narcissist are very clever and also understand this information, they will make people they’ve targeted out to be a narcissist, calling anything you accomplished in life as bragging etc, their goal is to isolate, disenfranchised, so that everything you say to anyone will be taken as proof that your narcissistic…question, does narcissistism tendencies run in families ??
My mom and older siblings are still trying to abuse me even at the age of 38. It doesn’t affect me anymore. They are treating me the same way they treated my dad before he passed. I notice it and they know I noticed it. I just use it to my advantage now. It is funny to see them try to get me mad and not succeed.
My mother was a true narcissist and pathological liar, I caught on to all her tricks, never trust them, called on it, pissed her off to no avail . When you retaliate they’ll take it because they want to know what you know, but never tell them. It infuriates them . Don’t give them amo. Her sister in-law was just like her ” needy and greedy” 😂😂😂😂😂
More dangerous is narcissist woman I hv a friend who’s a lawyer a narcissist. Once I understand how she use people and how she manipulates them I silently started to ignore her and stepped out from her circle of friends. On the other hand she saw us very friendly attitude but behindvalways bad mouthed about all her friends who help her . I walked out silently stay silently Now she phoned to my mom acting as a victimize one I never explain things Then after a month She phoned me I answer her very cool manner and told her I m busy now will catch u later I know inside her mind she is angry with Me I saw How she hate people, jealous when she couldn’t control them. Anyhow she can’t dage me much I 7sually Stable and independent and not closed friends or common friends with her. Anyhow this is very useful knowledge to be careful . thank you.
I’ve been realizing I’ve been dating a narcissist . I began learning about them and also about myself being an empath. So I’ve constantly been preyed on throughout my life by them. I’m 47 and even was married to one for almost a decade. I’m just coming out of this one physically abused along with every kind of abuse. I am getting my nose reset tomorrow and I also have 3 facial fractures and Multiple contusions. He did finally get arrested but to my surprise his family is calling me yelling for beating myself up and blaming him. I have a protective order but I would surely hope the judge doesn’t actually believe that. But then again he is so malicious I’m sure he will concoct something sinister. I’ve joined websites and groups about this and I’m ready to put this behind me and finally be free to live a free happy life that I’ve been robbed of.
True! The sad part is on many occasions you find out who they are but still stick around them because you feel vulnerable and lonely or empty. The thing is it isn’t worth it. Learn to love yourself. Learn to be a lone wolf. Learn to let evil people go. Either that or you play them at their own games.
One of the famous go to phrases of the narcissist is, “I don’t know what you’re talking about “,when called out on their b.s.One of the key things covered here is to “Never let your guard down “,the ability to character assassinate someone they’ve targeted with other associates and colleagues. Being the cowards that they are, they will wait until the person has left the room,laughing and talking with them, before they begin their tactics to discredit and destroy that person’s reputation. They genuinely hate everything that they can’t manipulate and control. They are so sick that if you escape their control and manipulations, you are going to be attacked repeatedly by them.
Very good. And please take it seriously. It is easy to think in your mind that a narcissist does not make such evil plans, because he appears like a wolf in sheep’s clothing. The covert narcissist of course is more subtle in this approach. I have a sister-in-law who has nowhere to turn, and has asked (in narcissist tactics) that I decorate my house and make a wonderful Christmas for her. All the while she has been calling family and creating wedges between them and I. But I know that she wants to eat me up, like the wolf she is, like a turkey dinner, in the end. I really wish the best to all of you, during the holidays. Be careful, and always make it special for yourself first. It is ok to say “no” to the wolves.
If this is not enough to make you leave a narc,let me tell you I read a story about a narc mother,who was good to one daughter and left another in hoapital premarure and never visited them,beat them up when they finally took that child home and the spoilt child ended up feeling sorry for their sibling,aa they were made to beleive their sibling was bad and deserve this. This is heartbreaking.
This is insane. I can’t even believe I’m listening to this random article that YouTube inexplicably recommended. I’m 33, and haven’t spoken to my mom in six years because she abused me since the day I was born and tried to get back to it when I got out of the army at age 27. I’ve searched for years to find a word to describe her long list of behaviors, but I could never find that word until now. Thank you.
I know this all too well. Family, friends, close companions. I dealt with this all my life. My own mother is cursed with this. Her behavior drove away the last ally she had. I wish I knew where Michael Jones was. In the town I live in the Kalamazoo valley is laden with such behavior. Speaking of my enemies who were once friends of mine who turned on me because I’ve become stronger than them. The building I live in i made the mistake of getting involved with someone and that spiraled out of control so this individual went around Kalamazoo and Battle Creek talking bad about me and having folks turn against me. This is the song and dance of all parties involved. I am an artist and musician in a band and people talk about me all the time and every time I take the city bus I get grimaced at for whatever reason they can think of. This topic speaks volumes to the town I live in. I got into relationships with these locals and they’ve all treated me like sh*t. And this is why I really don’t want get involved anymore with the local population especially, if they have bad intentions . I’m dealing with someone now who won’t leave me alone uses knowledge of the universe if I don’t give in to her demands saying that I’ll be judge by the universe if I don’t choose her as a viable mate. Family is just as guilty as toxic friends! What I’ve dealt with in life is draconic and reptilian in nature. So in all due diligence, be aware of being tempted by the fruit of another!
Ironically, last night I recorded and posted a article regarding my own experiences on this topic…everything in all of this content creaters information is on point. Even I had difficulty just walking away in silence. After about 3 days away from him the “brain washed” fog cleared. So i talked about it, and posted it. I saw red flags in the beginning, but questioned them due to his situation, empathizeing it was his stress level, providing his alibi for bad behavior. So yes I was aware, but questioning the entire time. Sadly, I have ended relationships in the past for less, than what i put up with with this individual. I will never question my hunches ever again. I assure you.
I wish I knew this when I was younger and before I got married to the abuser.. I had to learn this lesson in my life because it made me grow into the strongest woman I am now.. I have a wonderful coach who has taught me how to love myself again.. this is the truth of my first spouse, everything that you have said, down to the children, my children have also learned.. I AM NOT A victim of this trauma anymore.. woohoo..
I’ve learned a lot about this from Utube recently. I went thru a divorce 88 times in court with one. I won86 times but there was just misery. 20 years later(now) again in court for the last two years with one. It’s a nightmare that No one should ever have to have. Keep lecturing people on this type of person and sickness so that they will be be more educated than I was about this. Even the judge is falling for his manipulation. His lawyer as well. My lawyer has got it finally. Good luck to you all. I wish you the best. Run as far away from them as you can. These people are so toxic both to you and your children. You will be saving everyone’s sanity. The NEVER GET BETTER.
Oh my gosh. I’ve educated myself with other people on YouTube and in other ways learning about narcissistic behavior and other things and although I appreciate their help, I must say the way that you explain to narcissist was so detailed and so informative and it opened up my eyes all the more to their behavior I also like how you explained it not only both professionally but not so technical and simple terms. And your tone of voice is real and genuine and pleasant. I can’t thank you enough for helping me understand the behavior of a narcissist. It made me realize all the more or what I deal with and what I have to watch out for. I try to be positive and look at the world as beautiful as well as people but I have to say that there are more narcissistic people in this world than good people and that’s why it’s hard to have good people in your lives and people that you can trust and to be safe. I believe that that’s why people are hurting each other and killing each other in this world and against each other in countries because of narcissistic behavior. If people would educate themselves spiritually and psychologically we would have a more peaceful place but it seems like 99% of this world does not do that and that’s why there is so much chaos in this world. I pray that God bless you and reward you for all the help that you give us people out here and I pray that you are also safe, in good health and blessed always. Thank you and God bless you 💖🥰💖
My older brother got trapped into marriage by a narcissist. He had plans to go to art school which meant leaving town. She got pregnant and I believe she planned it to trap him. I remember she would constantly say Infront of my brother she gave up her dream to work as a stenographer and gave it up for Steve when she got pregnant. In reality he gave up his dream for her and she manipulated him into marriage.
Wow I had all the above..lol… he told me tht, he might have prostate cancer and they have to do a procedure see if it’s actually cancer and when I asked him what kind of procedure and when is the procedure… When procedure has been done (so called) he tells me they did a long cut on his testicles, and then put a Band-Aid on it….AND then he went right back to work…. I said huh…. IT DON’T HURT, ARE YOU COMFORTABLE.. HE’S SAYING AIN’T NOTHING WRONG LOL ……
Yes, this article resonates with me, this is y mother and sister- all tactics that they have pulled with me, even as a child 🙄 and I have All that gas lighten, hovering, and flying monkeys 🐒 🙈, my family even stoop so low that they went on a website name Radaris and said that I was deceased, and I am NOT, there is NO money, life insurance they want get because am NOT dead!!
I’ve dealt with a person with this condition even long after we separated over the course of 39 years along with his multiple “Flying Monkeys” stalking and keeping an account of my locations or if I’m in a relationship with someone else. If I was, he would Target that person and assign his once again “Flying Monkeys” to watch and stalk them 24/7. As for me, I am a Strong-Minded Woman and have managed to Look him in the Eyes and Look as if he was Never THERE and Keep it Moving! No More “Vampires” for Me 🏃♀️💨💨💨💨💨💨💨🧟♀️
Everything this man said is true. It was like listening to what’s taking place in my life now. I’m forced to work next to a (self diagnosed bipolar)narcissist 10 hours a day- 4 days a week. It’s been one of the most trying experiences in my life. It’s built me up, broke me down but what it hasn’t done is break me. IT WILL NOT BREAK ME!! It’s teaching me lessons hard learned in life and thus a blessing in sheeps clothing.
This is a trait most commonly found in women. They always play the victim, weak and fragile role to gain sympathy. Once they get it you fall into their trap. I’ve seen this with the lies or gaslighting of my mother growing up all the time and with my ex-wife. I believe many people are confusing the term but just implying if they meet one of the s characteristics they are a narcissist. But in truth they need to complete the entire circle. All to manipulate the dominance in the relationship between others by: 1. Immature childlike behavior 2. Try to win over others through playing the “victim” card. Either by crying, looking fragile, or valuable 3. Lying/Gaslighting a small situation to make it bigger than what it is 4. Showering overwhelming love and support to gain sympathy and followers If they only play one of the roles it’s not being a narcissist. If a men is more dominate but doesn’t act like a child, care of winning the “V”ictim card, or gas lighting situations, this doesn’t qualify the term of narcissist. As a women crying, but not acting like a child, lying, and showering love, all the while not wanting dominance in a relationship doesn’t equate to narcissist. “They need to play all the parts of the manipulation scheme/tactic.
In my case as a single dad, i had several people with narcissistic traits around me. Including my own mother. When i found out what was going on in my life and confronted them, my own mother called child services on me, and all hell broke loose. Let me put it short and simple, most of the narcissists i have met work in public positions such as child services, police, psycholigists, lawyers, and judges in the court of law. Atleast in my country.
My main concern is that the narcissist is dealing with anger issues, and this has left me scared. I am frightened about what he may do. He first left aggressively, and the second time his aggressive behaviour was louder, more public and more physical. While I have no contact, he has not met any of my contacts to use monkeys. How worried should I be now? What will he now do? Scared.
I work with a narc and I have been successful by simply ignoring them, even though they probably talk about me, I ignore that as well . The point is it don’t matter to me what anyone thinks about me but God, so I just let the narc do their thing, cause at the end of the day when I do not react then people will began to see the truth in regarding to their unhealthy obsession with me …
My mothers approach was always to just live life and if someone attacks you ignore it, it’ll go away. Well I did that with my ex narcissist until he utterly destroyed my life like a snow globe to concrete. Now I’m broke from fighting for my children in court, my parents are broke from helping me and he’s talked my children into walking away from me. He ruined motherhood for me. Protect yourself from the moment you suspect a person is a narcissist. It could mean your whole life and all that you know.
This article explains everything I suffered and went through when I was with a narcissist in a relationship. It’s very eye opening. I went back 3 times before I found the strength to think of my self worth and leave. I left . I walked out of his life. I finally started to work on my peace of mind and happiness. It’s hard to do. You feel lost. You can finally start working on yourself. It’s a great feeling to finally have.
I have a co-worker who is “the problem child,” out of everyone in our department. She has many of these qualities. First, I will call her Co-Worker B. Idk if she’s a narcissist, but, she’s extremely passive/aggressive. She definitely loves all attention on her, whether positive or negative, too. She DEFINITELY plays the victim at every twist & turn. Out of the blue. I keep praying & saying: if she could at least just be kind to everyone…… just be kind & people will actually like you & not be annoyed by you/her ugly ways. Just be kind & then our whole work crew would actually get along well with everyone in our department….. but, she’s the “key problem child,” and she would probably laugh & take pride in knowing she is the “problem child!” B: she pretends to be hurting in her hands, back, head, & etc. If she isn’t getting any attention by acting out, “oh, my head hurts!” Then, she will stand up & “fall” – then, other co-workers from other departments will rush to her side & pity her. “Are you ok? Here, give me your hand. Let me help you up.” She loves the attention. Yet, she wasn’t hurt to begin with. But, she will act hurt so the other people will baby her. It’s like, she has her face in her hands pretending to be hurt & she smiles or grins while screaming in agony how hurt she is. After a while, I stopped paying attention to her. I see her games. All the time. Co-Worker A: she has real allergies to scent. She can’t be around hand sanitizer. Air fresheners. Etc. Co-Worker B: she says she has the exact same allergies, but, it’s a lie.
Sadly I never realized my ex husband was a narcissist until long after we split. I feel sick everytime I hear a podcast or read an article, as I check one more box on the ” yup, he did that” checklist. It’s sickening how he has gotten away with it, and yes he’s turned two of my sisters against me with his lies and manipulations. I haven’t spoken a word to him or about him in 10 years, and I just learned from a niece that finally broke away from all that toxicity, thst every family gathering she’s seen him at, he eventually steers the conversation to me. Still . THATS SCARY.
To a narcissist, you will never be enough. To a narcissist, you will never have enough of what they believe they deserve. And you, in a relationship with a narcissist, will keep giving till you eventually become empty…you then become a shell, a husk, of what you once were… and then they will desert you, because you have nothing left to give them. Narcissists leave a trail of abandoned relationships, and those relationships are dovetailed with no time between them…not quite monkey branching, but the fact remains, a narcissist can’t live with themselves. To themselves, they are valueless without the adoration of whoever is their “one” at that moment.
So many people are aware of this disorder. You would think they would stay away from situations that involves bullying or targeting since this is a tool or narcs, but that is not the case. Seems like narcissists talking about narcissists. Sniff, sniff, sniff. Most people reeks of this problem on some level. If you are a covetous person, you are likely a narcissist or a strong tool.