Parents are increasingly demanding that schools teach their children life skills, social skills, and moral values. A new report suggests that parents should take an active role in teaching these skills at home through projects that provide real-world examples and lessons in decision-making and problem-solving. This is one of the best ways parents prepare their children for adulthood by acting as their teacher and role model to help them learn the many skills they will need.
A parent trap is the unrealistic expectation placed on parents to build a wide range of important skills in children. This handbook is designed to assist schools in implementing life skills education and supportive school environments. It highlights the importance of fostering independence, resilience, and success in children’s lives by teaching problem-solving, time management, socialization, independence, and learning about rewards and consequences.
Life skills are exactly what school is supposed to teach a young person. Parents cannot teach their kids how to interact with people their own age. Many parents believe that teachers should be magnanimous to fill the gap by teaching their kids the confidence skill, but it seems that the skill is not being taught.
The study reveals that it is not the school’s job to raise children; it is the responsibility of parents to impart crucial life skills such as critical thinking, emotional intelligence, and decision-making abilities. Children should be taught to work just like adults would teach them to bathe or brush their teeth.
In conclusion, parents play a crucial role in teaching their children life skills, such as critical thinking, emotional intelligence, and decision-making abilities, at home.
📹 Life Skills Parents Should Teach Their Children
Because of the importance children have on our lives, we have compiled the most important life skills parents should teach their …
What are the 7 essential life skills?
Life skills are defined as the abilities to identify, analyze, and effectively respond to challenges, to think critically and communicate effectively, to make sound decisions, to think creatively, to manage interpersonal relationships, to understand oneself, to empathize with others, and to cope with stress.
Is it necessary to have life skills?
The development of life skills can provide numerous benefits for individuals and employers. These skills include problem-solving, self-awareness, and decision-making abilities. Students can develop new thinking and problem-solving methods, recognize the impact of their actions, build confidence in spoken and group skills, analyze options, and appreciate others. Additionally, employers value employability skills such as self-management, teamwork, time and people management, adaptability to different roles, and the potential to lead by influence. Despite students’ hard work, many struggle to gain employment due to the importance of these skills in the job market.
What are 10 basic life skills?
The ten essential life skills are as follows: emotional management, communication, creative thinking, critical thinking, decision-making, empathy, interpersonal skills, and problem-solving. The capacity to make sound decisions is a vital component of exemplary leadership and a key driver of creative thinking. The aforementioned skills facilitate enhancements in mental health and facilitate more robust critical and creative thinking abilities.
Why is it so hard to teach your own child?
The intimate relationship between parent and child can create a challenging educational environment due to the emotional weight that comes with teaching. Parents often struggle with managing their own anxiety and wrapping up their children’s accomplishments and failures with their own self-worth. This can lead to a catastrophizing view of their children’s struggles and their own self-worth. Children are also more likely to take criticisms from their parents as personal slights, interpreting it as disappointment or unhappy feelings.
Even healthy communication styles between parents and children can exacerbate stress, which is a hindrance to effective learning. In stressful situations, information can bypass the learning centers in the brain and lead to emotional responses such as frustration, overwhelm, and giving up. Dr. Jennifer Cruz, the clinical director of the pediatric psychiatry program at New York Presbyterian, emphasizes the importance of healthy communication in fostering a positive educational environment.
How to teach students life skills?
Group activities are a great social practice that teach skills such as compromise, listening, filtering thoughts and feelings, and showing respect. Students can choose roles in their groups and intentionally teach these skills. These projects can be connected to the general education curriculum for students with special learning needs or for fun. Activities like building gingerbread houses, decorating pumpkins, and building the tallest structure using straws and spaghetti can help students practice social skills in an authentic setting, generalizing the skills they are teaching and applying them outside of school.
Life skills are vital for students’ overall success and well-being, and they are relatively easy to implement. By making group activities fun, students learn how to navigate life and make their future experiences more enjoyable.
Are we born with a skill or is it taught?
Talent is a natural ability to see or do something in a certain way, which can be learned and developed over time. Skill, on the other hand, is something that has been learned and developed over time and is something that one desires to master. The quote “desire is more important than talent” highlights the importance of tapping into one’s natural aptitudes. Talent exists in people, and the more one tunes into their desires and passions, the more they will tap into their natural aptitudes.
For years, the author felt they didn’t have any talent, but it was only when they moved towards what they were passionate about and curious about that they began to see their superpowers come through. They believe that everything they’ve discovered about themselves has come from hard work and learning.
Are parents supposed to teach life skills?
Teaching life skills to children is crucial for their development and future success. Starting with simple daily tasks, children should be able to follow a routine, maintain personal hygiene, choose outfits independently, and participate in household chores. These skills also help children develop self-confidence, adapt to life changes, and face challenges like bullying. They also give them a voice in school and society, and help them understand their responsibilities and rights in life.
These skills, regardless of their variety, pave the way for a prosperous life and a bright future, which is a desire every mother wants for her child. By the age of 12, children should be able to follow a daily routine, take care of themselves, and save money effectively.
Is skill learned or natural?
Skills are learned and developed skills, such as bookkeeping, administration, and interviewing. They are not naturally occurring and require hard work and dedication. Talents, on the other hand, come naturally and are easier to develop. Talents can never be acquired, but knowledge can always be grown. Demonstrated talent can be easier to excel at than skill learning, making individuals more valuable to an organization if they are talented at their job than if they simply learned related skills.
Should parents decide the career?
Parents should support their children’s career choices by assisting but not dictating their decisions, providing freedom and time for their skills to develop, providing motivation to develop and achieve, encouraging them to pursue interests and ambitions, and instilling a responsible attitude and mature outlook. When helping with education choices, it is crucial to consider that decisions made in early life can impact a child’s career path. Parental preference can lead to a child following a vocation they are not interested in, while practical guidance and support can lead to poor choices.
Each child is unique, and adopting a similar career role to either parent may not be the best course of action. By being positive and supportive, parents can help their children make informed decisions about their future.
Are parents supposed to teach their child?
Having a child is a significant and complex gift, and as parents, it is our responsibility to teach them the world and prepare them for future challenges. While it can be challenging due to children’s varying responses to criticism and discipline, firm communication and actions can help navigate the process. Instilling values of independence and self-sufficiency in children is a valuable lesson that parents can impart to their children. By being firm with words and actions, parents can navigate the challenges of parenting without facing any problems.
Do children learn better from their parents?
Parents are instrumental in their children’s development, providing guidance and support in a multitude of areas, including numerical cognition. Additionally, parents serve as models for their children, influencing their learning through observation and emulation.
📹 Stop Caring What Your Parents Think|Jordan Peterson
Must-read Jordan Peterson Books: ▷ Beyond Order: 12 More Rules for Life: https://amzn.to/3sawG0G ▷ 12 Rules for Life: An …
People pleasers often start off as parent pleasers Being a good girl made me the most depressed person.No room for mistakes was allowed . Whenever I made a mistake i was told I have become a bad child and i have changed To me that made me a perfectionist and my biggest reget in my life was not making mistakes I was only loved through my achievements and how much other people praised me That in turn made me angry And after a long time of letting it all go,i finally realised my parents will never change and they are humans too They make mistakes too I should have understood that from the get go
When I was in university and wanted to live on campus my mom said, “Well, if you live on campus, then your aunts and uncles will say you’re a libertine for leaving home before been married”. Then when I graduated the least supportive person for me to move out of state was my mom. At this point I absolutely don’t care what anyone has to say about me if I can get a better job by moving out of state. Are you paying my bills for the rest of my life? No! My brothers did whatever they wanted. Geeze. Sometimes I hate been a woman!
The issue with the parent child dynamic is the manipulative nature of it all since they often remind you that questioning parents is a sign of disrespect. This baseless and emotionally fueled tactic can easily be counteracted by replying that manipulating people with the parent -family argument is the real indicator of disrespect.
I once asked “am I making a mistake caring what Mom thinks?” and I never got an answer. I got the usual banter of “we love you and we want you to be happy,” which didn’t answer my question. Most of the time when I ask a direct question, I get no real answer. The articles of JP here finally give me an answer of some kind and a sense of certainty.
Parents motivation: Guilt trip, gaslight, comparison, show off anger and firmness while lecturing about their past academic days, generation gap lectures and literally every kind of abuse in the name of motivation, toxicity and in the end gives you an indirect way to say “not good enough” And the root of all the insecurities and self doubt starts to grow or what your going through, self esteem gets destroyed eventually and you always get the feeling Why am I still not good enough? Actually you are good enough for yourself, it’s just the society which creates random insecurities literally on the younger generation Like from family to community with nonsense unrealistic stories to gain authority or toxic motivational lectures It’s society, the ugly one with toxic standards and formation, Not you, your good and alright just the way you are. All you have to do is create a wall against the society so that whatever they do, you just mind your own business without any care of what they say and live your life while creating the best version of yourself So again As I repeat be yourself while creating the best version of you . Dump society’s standards 👎 Live your life👍✊ and be real 🙋🏾♀️!
American culture fascinates me. In my culture, you are under your parents rule till the day you die because there is a hierarchy in place. My boyfriend is American and I’m shocked how he tells his mom to back off and stay out of his life. If I said that to my mom I’ll be underground lmao but I do see the mental toll it takes on me and how despite being fkn 25, not 12, I’m still treated like a child and I have a hard time making decisions I WANT because I’m always doing what will make my parents happy and keep the peace. It doesn’t help I’m the only girl in the family…
I felt so unhappy when I tried to live the way my parents wanted me to. I still respect them, and I don’t hurt them. But sometimes their opinions on my life doesn’t fit with the way I want my life to be. Whenever I try to decide, my mom doesn’t speak, or listen to me, she ignores me until I change my mind. Which rarely happens
yes my parents deaths were crushing, dad when i was much younger and mother recently, both times extremely shocking, My parents were always my good friends and i could talk to them about anything and everything, neither of them ever forced us to do anything, they gave sound advice and they were very loving. It is hard for people to believe that, but it is true for me.. and i thank God every day for that..
my parents had me at an older age.. we never had a relationship, strictly authoritarian. they never encouraged me to go to school and denied me help, and prevented me from getting any loans. they never thought i could do it, never had faith in me. now they are approaching their 70s and i’m my mid 20s and i feel like they made me the biggest loser.
One of the effects of when you let your parents guide is that you would never know what you truly want to do in your life, I am battling with the very same crisis. Living with parents but I have stopped talking to them and finding my purpose in life, I care for them but I never felt so relaxed and calm.
If any parents are reading the comments – take this as a warning of how your children can grow up to resent you if you tyrannise their life. Maybe ultimately it’s not so bad to leave your parents behind like a bird leaving the nest but I still like to hope that being able to enjoy their presence at an older age is a wonderful thing that should be fought to have as much as possible. But alas if you’ve tried everything and nothing works, it really is okay to let them go honorably.
My mother doesn’t agree to my choice of spouse. Anyway I married.. But my father is not openly supporting too.. She abuses me every day.. I really care for them.. I will show them that.. They think that I am selfish that’s why I married someone they didn’t approve.. But I’ll show them that I am true person
I think I knew this in my 30s but they give me the silent treatment every time I do what I decide to do. Also, there are two of them and they always back each other up no matter how ridiculous the other is being. Always. I’m single. So here I am at 51 locked in to a stand off with my parents. Usually when they gave me the silent treatment I would crack after 6 months and go back to them to ”apologise”. This time, I am just standing really certain in my own perspective, my own experience. And that offends them so much that this particular silent treatment has been going on since I was 49! So. They mean business with their silent treatments.
I’m 20 and recently started making my own decisions by sometimes defying them. I am trying to establish a peer relationship based on mutual respect and understanding. It’s going well so far since I’m not directly telling them they’re wrong. That would sound condescending so I’m showing them that I’m capable of making sound choices.
I’ve lived for my parents so much. They both had cancer as I was a teen and I got into the idea they could be gone which turned out into doing studies I hated for them then getting into huge depression that turned into some kind of psychosomatic pain which is still not gone 3 years later. Then I decided to pursue what I really wanted to see if that would heal me and I partially healed but my parents don’t understand my choice. I am not available enough for them. (Once per month per parent as they are seperated) I hate my parents sometimes.
I like the tinker bell fantasy “if you do nothing, you’ll be nothing later, take a risk” article by him more. I also want to say that going to the dorms and also having my own apartment later were extremely important to be becoming independent. I learned I am a good person, and being away from my abusive mother was exactly the safe environment of a college that I needed. That being said I still rely on my mother (from a distance) for safety. I think we need people for guidance in our lives, even if it is not parents. It takes a village.
This is sticky. I love my parents and want their approval. They don’t always agree with the choices I make but as long as they are living, I will try to strive to be the kind of people they are and the kind of person they raised me to be. I respect, honor and cherish my parent’s opinion. They’ve helped me make great decisions and helped me out of loads of trouble. I dread the day when I can’t ask them “daddy, what do you think?” Or “Momma, how would you do this?”
As I grow older, started to think and realized if parents were the source of incompetence for not nurturing correctly. They wanted me to be enslaved instead of encouraging me to express and choose path and educating without biases. They’re driven by insane emotions, negative emotions. I have doubt in them. I was wrong.
I became a man child. I was in a path of becoming an independent adult and was going to assist them by helping pay off their home. Truly, I was depressed most of my teenage life and young adult life during university studies. It did not go well for me. I got ill. But my narcissistic parents just used my failure, my illness, and inability to get a job to continue their mental abuse but now as an adult. I have severe ADHD and am probably autistic as it was difficult for me to have friends when I was in university. I almost became a teacher at age 25 but this career did not go as planned. I am not sure what I became after this. I felt more like an adult, taller, and stronger. Now in my 30s, I felt like I retrogressed, more childish, my family relationship has been strained, I sound childish now, weaker. I have argued with my parents for years. My mother and father always lacked empathy and did not let me correct my mistakes and would always make my mistakes into greater problems. This always happened since I was a child.
I am terrified of telling my parents I want to pursue music. I don’t have any reason to be, actually quite the opposite. My parents have been great to my brother and I and have done nothing but want the best for me. Idk why I’m so afraid of their reaction, but I it’s holding me back from further pursuing a career in music.
Same. Somebody says that if I get dependant from my parents and then I can control my life by myself, and If I get any help from my parents I should lend them some my life in their control in crutial parts, because they’re the only one who cares about me. Sadly, I’ve never felt happiness under my parents, and I don’t agree that they could give me the best way In my life. Their way of thinking are 30 years older than me, and ofcourse something from me is much better than my parents(ofcourse my parents are also better than me in some other parts; I respect them) but they don’t want to listen to me because that would make me out of control which will make them tired. I have been in culture where kids have to respect their parents in no reason, absolutely, and I think those cultural things makes some parents in my country that THEY are always give better choice than their kids. They don’t truly respect their kid’s point of view. When I lived only in my country I felt like I was a bad guy, but when I’ve been California for 6 months, I just realized how good person I am and how my culture and parents are so pressive to the youngsters and not respectful. These kind of thinking(of parents, ofcourse) makes their kids really hard for their life, and also makes relationship between their kids and their parents worse. Well ofcourse, they won’t change until I just move out of my house further and further…. Sadly…. So I really admire life in US, well life maybe also have hard point in there, but I’m convinced that It has better, relaxed relationship than here.
My parents divorced when I was 16. My mother is religious and seems to live in the past and isn’t very well informed, my father thinks he’s smarter than everyone because he “watches the news” everyday. When i speak to my mother she always looks at me face to face, but everything goes over her head and she doesn’t have any idea about what i say, and reply’s back with something that has nothing to do with what i just said. My father on the other hand never looks at me in the face when i speak, he just stares at the computer, cell phone, or even when those are not around he’ll just stare at something and never replies back at all except for “uhmm” and in a very bored i dont give a shit way. I really don’t want to have anymore contact with them in my life
I love my parents but we have had conflict ever since I was four. My parents divorced when I was four and now I have four parents. I love them all but I can’t always talk to them because I feel like what ever I say they won’t understand. I’m 18 now and I still feel they look at me like a child. I’m a senior in highschool. However I’ve never had a job because I’ve been so focused on school. Im planning on getting my drivers license this year so I think everything will turn out ok. I’ve already been expected into my university and I’m happy and proud of myself. However, when my parents tell me I don’t take care of myself I don’t understand them sometimes because I feel I do take care of myself. Im starting to drink more water, keep myself clean, cooking for myself, cleaning behind myself. Im trying to do it all and learn and figure out what is best for me.
My mom never encouraged me as a child to pursue a career In animation as a character designer and visual development artist because she depends on her friends to agree and disagree and also she tells me that I have to be a certain race to do this job and tells me you have brown skin and her friend said she never seen character designer in canada who is indian only techs
JP, sir you always help me. I’ve had a traumatic experience with my family, my mom, dad left me with my uncles and aunts when I was a kid and they were ignorant and arrogant jerks. Fast forward to today when I’m trying to heal myself, my mom and dad expect me to submit my whole life to their desires just because it’s a tradition of sons acting like absolute servants to their parents. I tried many times to help them out of our conditions, but all I got was neglect, criticism and disrespect. Now I’m looking forward to the day when I’ll graduate, I’ll leave this country and never come back 🙂
My parents became wealthy 1st generation immigrants. Often they would tell me to work in the business because it’s for you. But when I tried to do anything creative, make decisions, problem solve, I was shot down. It hindered my growth and suppressed my creativity. I eventually realized my help in the business was for my parents. Right now I have 3 brothers over 30, one of those brothers is 41, working in the business off of a small stipend. They are lazy and my parents constantly complain but will never let them go either.
(I’m 32) So my boyfriend asked my parents for my hand in marriage and my mom has been on this tangent for a week now. My has been thinking things over before giving his blessing. My boyfriend lives in another state but the kicker is that we’re only an hour and 40 mins away from each other you would think I’m moving to another county 😂. She doesn’t think I should move “so far away” and that I have more support here. She has this God complex like she knows everything like everything she says is “right”. It’s like she doesn’t want me adulting like I should. At first she couldn’t wait to call my boyfriend her son in law but now that the opportunity has presented itself and I’ll be moving to the state he’s in oh she’s furious lol. She keeps finding new things to come up with or a scenario to come up as to why I should stay here. 🤦🏽♀️
My father wants me to be a nurse practitioner, but I want to pursue a career in Fine Arts and become an animator hopefully having my own series one day. However going to nursing school is making my dad very happy. He has a plan laid out for me where I will eventually become the owner of a hospital, and meet my future husband and settle done with kids, which is something I do not want, but I do it because it makes dad proud 😒. But I have all these ideas and skill for fine arts and animation, and have worked hard on writing my series. So as of now I’m stuck and not sure what to do, I’m afraid I’ll lose the respect of my dad if I listen to my heart.
So I work at a factory. Tbh money is nice but not something I enjoy to work at. They made me work factory jobs like them. I was working at a dealership doing like oil changes and changing tires and it was little pay but I enjoyed to learn more and get into more depth of the automotive industry. They told me I had to quit because I wasn’t going anywhere with it. Right now I have full confidence on where and what I want to do. The thing is I’m afraid to even say anything to them and yet this past week my dad said “look at that salesman… he didn’t go to college and here you are just working” like I wanted to say something but I held it in
I always had to take responsibility for my mom. She’s suffering from severe depression and PTSD due to her past traumas and experiences. She never divorced my father even though he’s a bit responsible for her PTSD as well. I learned at an early age on what it meant to have “children”. I’ve done all the paperwork for my parents and had to be there when decisions were made. It’s good and it’s bad. It made me highly responsible and I can rely on myself and I know that I can ONLY rely on myself. It’s good. But it did affect my relationship with other people as well. Not gonna lie about it. But it is what it is. I’ll still take care of them bc they are my parents. Not sure if I’ll ever have children or a partner. But it is what it is. Maybe that’s my destiny.
Every time I try to confront/have a personal and decisive discussion with my mother about something that doesn’t seem to be OK or if I’m trying to explain my point out, she keeps offending and comparing me to my father… They’re divorced, he’s mentally ill (on pills to keep in check the schizophrenic disease) and this doesn’t help me at all. I had 2 step-dads, the biological one was often marginalized but luckily I can cope with it but it’s hard sometimes… I came to the conclusion that she hates masculinity in general, which is a toxic way to handle life after all. My advice for someone in the same spot – go on your path, focus on yourself, ignore the negativity and distance yourself even more (when needed). For everyone that read this – God bless you. You’re stronger than you think
Children are not obligated to suffer the trauma of the parents. Children are indepent conscious smart humans. Not tools. And if parents are not willing to admit it, you have the outmost right and duty to be a monster and put boundaries so YOU can move on with your life. I know what’s like. I had to do it woth my parents. Telling them nicely for years solved nothing. They looked at me as:,, THE AUDACITY!? ” Only when I started to not give a f about their opinions and managed and succeeded by following my own path did I gain enough self confidence to fucing lash out at them as a mad wolf. Barely afterwards i could get the respect i deserved. As if I was born in a family of beasts not humans! I bet you a trilion dollars most of the crimes in the world can be traced back to dysfunctional families! Therefore most of the times, the parents should go to jail! And the state for failing us.
I wish my mother was realistic. She blames me for everything, never takes my side in any situation, etc. She’s a blame thrower, she’s SUPER manipulative, and she tucks tail when you call her out. She doesn’t believe she’s wrong, EVER. I’m just going to treat her well, and ignore her ideas, because my dad thought for her for almost forty years, and now she doesn’t know what to do, doesn’t listen to anyone, and doesn’t care if anyone else is damaged by her flagrantly stupid choices
my parents always want the next level. always a better job, always a better salary. they think more about the salary. even if i were at the top company in my country i bet then they’d push me to move abroad and work in Europe or something. i’m never enough. my current salary makes me happy. the job is not stressful and no toxic people, i have a social life, can go to events, have hobbies,weekend getaways to nature, a nice house etc. and with my fiancee bu my side. my life is good for me. but their dissatisfaction still makes me sad. i can’t help it
We all have our special set of talents in life, I surpassed my father in automotive repair, but not in carpentry. Now whenever I build something eg. a roof on my porch, deck for my pool, etc. he takes over the project and makes me feel like a fool. The funny thing is, he knows his shit. But dammit man, I get so furious when I’m belittled like that.
Another way to look at it: you want to befriend the things that disrupts your plan, so you can be comfortable enough to negotiate with them. If that doesn’t work, if they’re not willing to consider the prospect of you having any control, and the things keep disrupting your plans and have no regards for your pursuits, cut them off, no matter how harsh or painful that might be… I met this person who had a rocky relationship with her parents. She wanted to start her own business, but her parents wouldn’t let her, saying that the only way to become “filthy rich” is by working your ass of for someone else like the rest of us and praying you’ll win the lottery. She cut off all contact with her parents and started working het ass of. Today she runs a growing business, and she’s expected to become a millionaire within a decade. Suddenly her parents tried to contact her again while pretending they were always supported her dreams. She says that that’s not her style and she wishes for them that the lottery bills won’t bring them in soon.
I still don’t have a life with my mother who is 78 years old and I’m60 years old. I was a good kid. I’m still a good kid because I excelled and a good person . I stoped talking to my mother today. We just had a talk and she is who she always was and I tried to think better of her. I tried to accept her behaviors and i can’t any longer. She insulted me today and thats it.
I am 38 years old my parents been married for 39 years and my parents want me to be by myself…they are always in my relationship delimmas as if theirs is peaches and creams. All my exs tell me it feels like they are dating me my mother my sister and father. Amd that i will never have a relationship if my family always trying to give their 10cents to everything i do. When no one tells them what to do in their relationship.
My parents are the most disrespectful you can ever see. They’d judge anything. They expect me to spend every single free day with them, all we do is to sit and to stare at TV. Whenever I do something else instead of seeing them for few days then they start manipulation, saying “well die and you don’t even wanna see us etc.” . I have achieved many things personally/financially. But my family makes me wanna die
I am 47 years old and my parents are elderly. I have only recently realised that my mother is a narcissist and my father is an alcoholic (I’ve always known that) I went home for Christmas this year to spend some time with them. I shouldn’t have gone. It’s just cemented my feelings about the way that they treat me. Despite having cancer last year and almost dying, I am unable to get their approval. My mum is furious that I am thinner than her (I’m only thin because of the cancer) and my dad is not talking to me because I posted photos of him (and the rest of my family) on Instagram. It’s fucking ridiculous. I honestly don’t want to have a relationship with either of them anymore. Which is so sad because they are old and their time on this earth is limited. As may mine be as well. I have always been a disappointment to them and I have spent my life trying to seek their approval. I will never be good enough for them. It’s time that I stop caring.
I’m just trying my hardest man and maybe that’s not enough. I’m really trying. I don’t know how much more I can take. Is it all my fault? Am I just a terrible person and son? Maybe I am just the embarrassment of the family, the misery of the family, the reason my sibling and his girlfriend want to leave. Maybe I am just horrible, but something is screaming in me still it’s not. I fucking hate this, idk if I’m a narcissist or not and I hate my life rn. Idk how much longer I can take, this feeling feels like it’s lasted forever and I hate to play victim. I always try to see what I’m doing wrong with no motive of convenience, at least I think. Like I said, I can’t tell right from wrong anymore. But I have no friends and no one to talk to, no job or no drivers license which I’m in the process of getting but it’s taking longer than expected it. My father makes me feel like a loser, and my mother is never there for me. I have no girlfriend, no real meaningful friends who listen or are consistently there for me. My father constantly ridicules me and calls me a loser and I’m falling out with God. Someone please pray for me. I’m sick man, I just want comfort.
Whatever my mom advises me to do always backfires me. But I have always wanted her approval. I still do! I don’t wanna upset her. I don’t wear colours that she doesn’t like for me no matter how much I love it, I still talk to the people she likes no matter how much they’ve caused harm to me, I still go to places where she wants me to go no matter how much I hate that place. I’m 21. I know it’s not too late. But I just can’t switch my entire personality overnight. She’s selfish I know that very well. All she says is that I am a loser, and when I do something that I like she has some weird expressions on her face, she says I am making wrong choices and all, she never supported me in anything! When I was a kid she used to hit me for anything. If I mention those now, she says I’m lying and she has never hurt me. She is always emotionally unavailable for me. I always cried alone in the bathroom. I even tried to self harm when I was about 10/11. But all those stopped when I was 15 or 16. She stopped hitting me. But she started torturing me mentally. If something happens she stops talking to me for days. If I try to talk she ignores me. And she’s doing it until now. Sometimes she wonders why don’t I help her without her asking. Why don’t I take care of her! But I have not learned to do so, it doesn’t come from my heart. I am very passionate for other people. But I don’t know I can’t feel her pain. I don’t feel connected to her. Maybe that’s why I go extra miles so that I don’t end up hurting her.
I am basically not interested in coaching centers as I believe in self learning with the help of online teachers who are very qualified than coaching teachers..as I don’t go to coaching my parents doubt me a lot.They think I’m not doing the right thing or going in the wrong path. They dont understand my situation. For their doubt,I started to doubt myself!! Please help
I NEED HELP I am 20 yrs old I spent all my life in school trying to please my family and never disappointing them I was in 2nd year university where things got financially messy at home then I couldn’t continue But you see I spent my whole life in school,I got pretty good in architecture and I can say I am pretty creative I need help,1st time in my life I got suicidal thoughts😢 and for once I am thinking of leaving my family and go leave alone They (Dad&mom)make me feel like I am the cause of this financial crisis😢😢
Mines went rogue when i dyed my hair and got even more mad when i talked back saying how irrelevant it was :/ My psychologist didn’t even care ’bout it, and everyone i know was cheering me on except for them. I think (this is kinda dark) that they’re mad I’m not blonde anymore because they considered it a superior colour… Anyways, tried using common sense but doesn’t work. Any ideas?
My parents really want to take over my life, they push me to dump my cat like trash and dump my boyfriend because they want me to be single. My mom is really obsessed with my age and a my looks. She is telling everyone in the family that im single but im not. She is using my photos to catfish men on the internet and tell them in single eventhough im not. I’m a 31 year old woman… I’m independent but my father said that I’m always wrong and my choices in life are always wrong and he is always right.
I feel so horrible about myself 😢 my parents say “YOU can not be a football player ” my parents said this to me “YOUR BROTHER WILL BE A LAWYER YOUR LITTLE SIS WILL BE JUDGE I WILL GIVE YOUR SIBLING ALOT OF MONEY I WILL GIVE THEM MY PROPERTYS,ANS ILL GIVE YOU a field “PLAY YOUR STUPID FOOTBALL THERE I am a stupid unsuccessful dork 😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢
I have great parents, but there are a few bizarre things that bother them that i can’t reason with them about. They think stories with any form of magic or percieved magic is evil. As a writer, this frustrates and upsets me. Tolkien and cs Lewis are two of the greatest writers who ever lived, they were both christian/carholic and the wrote fantasy stories with magic. Is what they’ve made now suddenly evil even though they had christain values? It makes no sense. My stories will have a magic system, and I’m kind of grieving over the fact they won’t be very encouraging once they start reading what I’m making. I keep explaining to them that magic is just a writing tool, but all they can say in response is “evil is evil” and say that “God will reveal this to you in time” which is some of the most demeaning shit they’ve ever said to me. They’re normally people i can reason with, but this is such a weird argument that has no ground to it and they refuse to listen.
The more older we get i came to the realisation that yes respect your parents but dont let them control you in such a way that you relaise later that youcouldve lived your life at the same time learn what they shouldve taught us was to be able to ask them whats wrong n right and also give us freedom in such a way that we dont fuck up ourselves but now its like a religion thing n society too binding us so i understand now y americans let their child leave the house .
How about this dynamic… I’m in a situation where my mom is telling me that… the devil, will try to get me, to not talk to somebody (I think of how I have trust issues right now… And I shifted the way I talk to my parents, and others, even potential friends). And I’m feeling that my mom wants to protect me. It’s not her fault right? That’s the job of a mother, I don’t know where her heart is but am I meant to know where her heart is?
When I Was Younger I Was Always Taught to Put Family 1st,I Was Never Taught That It’d Come at a Such a Hefty Price,I Love my Family Always Will,But my Mental,&,Emotional Health Suck Now Because I’ve Always Done my Best to Put Them 1st,&,to Always Make Them Happy,I Have 0 Independence,I Hate Myself so Fucking Much
I live with my two brothers, away from my both parents in another country, my dad is very toxic and he failed in everything basically, he never had a job, he never provided any type of anything except being a narcissist and violent, he never put any thing in the right position basically if any of my siblings had trouble or just had a fight he would responds aggressively and make it worse we never asked him to do anything for us because we know the tragedy the trauma that we going to deal with after that . My mother is the one who chose this life, I’m telling you she had a choice of divorce, but she refused, she kept living with this abusing man, once this summer he pulled out a knife and tried to kill me in front of her and she never do anything! It was Avery simple basic issue that I had between me and my toxic brother, I know my story kinda not that clear, it’s because I have so much things that I want share but it would take me along time. My brothers that I’m living with are mean toxic type, they know that my mom always by their side and know pretty will she don’t see their faults even if they’re pretty bad and horrible, because they’re men ! She would say it with her words “you’re a girl and you have to be patient over you male brothers because they’re men, and this how men act(by abusing) and women are stronger and smarter, god made women to clean after men because they’re don’t know how to do it” and so on, basically she is trying to control me and change me into her! She always tell me how to love and act like a girl and treat men, meanwhile she married my dad, the question Is how to protect myself and my confidence from her and toxic family, I don’t wanna end up like her, or even close?
You need a better argument about why do you care what your parents think of you. We call care what people who know us, think about us. Sure, a stranger living 1000 miles away that I have never met can think whatever he wants, I won’t care. But people close to you matter. And for good reason that you know.
I made the decision to pull the plug on my dad because it was the right thing yo do. I also cared about the way he thought about me more then the person taking my coffee order. Hes a member of my family. I care for him and about him. Part of that is seeing myself through his eyes. Caring how he views me doesn’t control me. I still make moves. If I think he’s disappointed in a move I look at it and think. If I still thinks it’s the right decision I make it. I respect him and his opinion.
You must be loving, caring, and respectful to your parents, seek their counsel, and when they ask you for something, rush to do it. This is what Islam teaches me. As far as opinions go, especially those concerned with one’s affairs, none of them should stop one from pursuing a noble cause. There is no harm, I think, to do one’s own bidding regardless of parental opinion, taken that one behaves with the utmost love and respect.
You know what’s really bad is when the parents are out of control with their kids and then the kids bring their business to school like they tell all their parents’ business about what’s going on in at home now you got the school in your business cuz you are out of control at home and in school you the kids bad parent Hood
my mom and dad say respect tham but thare not one thig to respect he kick out there kid when get to 24 and Verbal abuse is all the time and only cares what about what they what and what me to give tham massage for just geting me a soda and shit like it suck and they hate on the usa all the time im from the usa and she and but my dad is they suck as a mom and dad i what to leave but i dont what to go back to my real fam and shit but i cry all the time my life sucks sometime i what to end but i dont bc my dog and grand ma is hare
I respectfully disagree. My thinking is that my parents chose to put financial stability on the line so that I could succeed. In a way they are investors or shareholders in me. Every good business owner will say that one role of the business is to appease the shareholders and make money for them and the business. Shareholders do not always know what is important for the business though. Therefore you should listen to your parents in all matters, but be willing to discuss and explain every disagreement. If you are middle class, think of how much they put into you. They lost social freedoms, and likely up to a quarter-million dollars in today’s money BEFORE COLLEGE. Think of that in yearly costs and take it into proportion to their yearly earnings over the years of raising you. They would have had starter position earnings most likely. If you disrespect your parents with this in mind, I truly hope the shame of this knowledge weighs on you your entire life.
I love my parents dearly and want nothing but the best for them ❤ BUT…………… I feel like I’m always pretending to be what they want me to be instead of who I really am. They don’t approve or like the real me so I give them what they want. And I have major resentment towards them because of it! I hide it from them and it’s building 🤯 💥 I try and be the bigger person but it’s killing me 😞